Tuesday, November 13, 2018

What Was I THINKING? -- Week Ten -- 2018

Week 10 – The race for mediocrity heats up

Apologies in advance to all of our many subscribers (4?) that love reading our parakeet paper, commonly known to all as the latest WWIT.  Business has stepped in the way of this reporter giving his full attention to every detail, so we may be a little smaller in size than usual.  (Probably a good thing.  Grin)

Problem is, when you take a gander at the standings in WWIT after ten weeks, you’ll notice one definitive thing stands out….

Almost EVERYBODY is still in the running for the Dunn-Edwards Fantasy Football Leagues’ worst award…. Also commonly known as….

The 2018 “What Was I THINKING?” Award!

More on the DFFL “Race for Mediocrity” later.  Protocol suggests that we normally start things off in the Genius Division, where we’ve seen one DFFL franchise owner step up his game to yet another level – Anthony Pitassi, of Mr. Go Lucky.

Anthony scored another perfect score in Week 10 of DFFL play.  By MY count, this means Mr. Pitassi has scored Genius points in eight of his last nine games in league.  He’s been on fire for a while, now.  Thusly, we’ll give the leader of MGL 7 Genius points for lowest score for the week, and another 2 genius points for the perfecto.  Note: With this nine-point score in Week 10, MGL now leads the pack by a whopping 11.5 points, with just three weeks of regular season play remaining.

Our Week Ten Genius Division second place winner was Jim Francis of the Bolts, who lost just 4 points to his bench for the weekend, courtesy of Frank Gore.  Let’s give the Commish 5 Genius points for the effort.  The Week Ten bronze medal goes to Jesus Cortez of the Mob Squad, who lost just 5 points to his bench for the weekend.  Rounding things out, we’ll give one bonus Genius point each to Full Tilt Poker, the Baltimore Ravens, the Killing Fields, and the Norsemen for their single-digit losses for the week.

OK, here’s how they stand after Week 10 of the 2018 DFFL Genius Division, with just 3 weeks of play left….


1.   Mr. Go Lucky (43.5 points) – Anthony extends his lead to 11.5 points. Call the engraver.
2.   Burbank Thumpers (32 points) – Bad time to have an off week, needs a big score, fast.
3.   Your Name Here (29 points) – Ryan’s capable, but he will need a perfecto this weekend
4.   The Killing Fields (28 points) – R.I.P. Le’Veon Bell. Robert has done well without him.
5.   Bolts (24 points) – A good week that didn’t translate to Week Nine play v. the dirty birds
5.   Run & Gun (24 points) – Still a possibility. You know how goofy the scores can get. :-D
7.   Trojans (20 points) – Just not Andy’s year this year.  He’ll come back strong in 2019.
7.   Baltimore Ravens (20 points) – Grant has his eye on the playoffs, he’s out of it here.
9.   Grim Reaper (10 points) – He’s 8-and-2.  I’m sure he doesn’t care about this WWIT.
10. Mob Squad (7 points) – I told you that you would pass me, Jesus.
10. Norsemen (7 points) – Only the Cards’ D/ST kept Rob from a perfecto in Week Nine
10. Full Tilt Poker (7 points) – Terrific – I’m now in last place.  What a great showing.

Yet to score – The Oakland Raiders (9 Straight quarters, no TD.)

Now, we move to the headline-makers of the DFFL, the WWIT division.  Friends, we have quite a show going on in this 2018 DFFL season.  No time for idle chatter, guys – Let’s ask that burning question that can hurt SO much….


Those of you that were paying attention to the Week Nine WWIT results saw our own Jesus Cortez, in just ONE week of play, jump up from the 8-spot, all the way up to the top of the list, with his nine-point WWIT loss. 

My friends, it has happened again.

No, no, not to JESUS.  To none other than one of our top players in the GENIUS Division, -- None other than Andrew Gillette, of the Trojans. 

So, just how bad WAS it for Andy last weekend, you ask? 
Hmm…. Well, Andy benched Eric Ebron (AGAIN), losing 21 points to the bench. 

AND… He benched Derrick Henry (who wouldn’t?).  14 more points lost.

And finally, Bench that Cowboy D/ST, while you’re at it.  13 more points.

All totaled, the Trojans gave back 48 points to the bench in Week Ten of WWIT, which, just like it did to the Mob Squad LAST week, has propelled the Tragic Trojans from the number 7 spot, all the way up to the top of the heap.  Ouch.

The silver WWIT medal in Week Ten goes to Alan Sullivan of The Grim Reaper, who lost 25 points to his bench, good for 5 WWIT points.  The Bronze Medal of Fultility goes to Ron Bolton of the ‘Gunners, who lost 26 points to his bench for the weekend.  We have two “bonus” WWIT points this week – one for Robert Abundis, who held onto Le’Veon Bell until the bitter end, and one for Jose Cano of the Thumpers, for a 20-point bench loss.

Well, that was how the points were won and lost last weekend… All these totals did was tighten everything up even MORE, and not less.  Four teams within 1 point of the top spot, and EIGHT teams, all within just four points.  This is going to be a WILD ride!  OK, here are the standings after Week Ten.


1.   Tragic Trojans (-23 points) – First time Andy EVER got into the top three in WWIT.
1.   Worst Show on Paper (-23 points) – Something tells me Jesus won’t win this thing
3.   Hoarse-Men (-22 points) – Rob’s never won a WWIT title.  Don’t think he will. 
3.   Grim Reeker (-22 points) – Week 10’s result is the exception, not the rule. No way.
5.   Dirty Birds (-19 points) – Needs to stay away from a “Herman Blunder.”
5.   Nameless Wonder (-19 points) –Just wait for that patented “Miller Move.”
5.   Dead on the Field (-19 points) – He’s won twice before.  Anything’s possible.
5.   Pop-Gun Run (-19 points) – Umm, yeah, no, I haven’t changed my mind.  No way.
9.   Beautiful Downtown Burbank (-16 points) – I still don’t think so.
10. Fully Tilted Poker (-11 points) – Hell, I could still win this thing.  I did it before.
11. Mr. Not-So-Lucky (-10 points) – Possible 2018 Genius Division champ.
11. Dolts (-10 points) – Forget it.  Better chance of the Jets winning the Super Bowl.

Well, that’s all for this week, friends.  As always, I have all the e-mails to ship out the parakeet paper every week, on Tuesday, normally around Noon.  Some of you don’t have Microsoft Office / Word?  If that’s the case, just check out the weekly WWIT at www.theacescasinoblog.com.  It’ll be there!  Have a good week!

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