Aces Casino "College Of Casino Game Knowledge:" The Fire Bet - What Is It, What Game Does It Come From, And How Do I Play? (Don't Worry, We Got This.)

The "Fire Bet."

I know, it sounds like something "The Donald" came up with on his way to earning his first "Emmy" on the "Celebrity Apprentice."  (Ed. Note" He WISHES.)

"Put $5 on that Fire Bet, or you're FIRED!"

The Craps side wager known as the "Fire Bet" first made it's appearance about three years ago, and to some, it's an enticing lil' side bet. Yeah, we'll admit it - This one roped us in, in the interest of quality news reporting, of course.  Never let it be said that we don't play-test things every once in a while.  You know, take it for a little spin.  (Ed. Note: Here's the untold story - He lost his $5.) 

First, a little background on the "Fire Bet:"  Perry Staci, a Las Vegas casino supervisor, invented this new proposition bet for craps players that is already being promoted at Harrah's, the Sahara, and the Rio.  You can also find this intriguing side wager on the layout at The Cannery on the North side of Vegas.

The bet is that the shooter will be able to make 3, 4, 5 or 6 individual points after a point is established. There are two different pay tables, paying either 7, 25,250, and 1,000 for one, respectively, or 6, 10, 200, and 2,000 for one. The betting limits are $1 minimum and $5 maximum, so a $5 bet could win either $5,000 or $10,000, depending on the pay table.

Passes or Craps rolls on the Come Out Roll do not count, nor does making the same point more than once. Special pucks and a customized table layout are all part of Perry's new addition to the Proposition Box.
While having a shot at winning $10,000 on a craps table for a $5 bet is exciting,this bet is easily the worst one on the layout, with a house edge of 21 to 25%,depending on the pay table.

Oooh, Pretty!

Above, in the image provided, you can see the chip markers used on the Craps layout images to show how the current Fire Bets are doing on any subsequent roll.  These chips appear on the layout during any rolls that involve wagers on the Fire Bet, in order to keep track as to how the players' wagers are doing.  Now, those gamers interested in the numbers surrounding the wager need look no further than the good people over at the infamous "Wizard of Odds" gaming sites, who have broken this side bet down better than Albert Einstein could EVER hope for.  You can check out all the odds surrounding the "Fire Bet" right here.  The Wiz is the BEST, and being grounded in the numbers is important, especially when the hard-earned dollars in the pocket are concerned. 

That's all for our latest edition of the "Aces Casino College of Casino Game Knowledge."  In subsequent issues of the Aces Casino Blog, commonly known around these parts as the orange county casino party company "parakeet paper," we'll touch on some of the other interesting side bets involved in the game of Craps that you may or may not have heard of.   Craps can be a GREAT "impromptu wagering" game.  Side Bets galore.

So, to that end, we'll start our "Side Bet-A-Thon" marathon on July 8th, so keep your eyes peeled for those blog entries in a few days.  But, before that, we'll be looking to hit July with a BANG (Ed. Note: An untimely Fourth Of July play on words.  Wow. Just. Wow.) when we take a look back at one of our all-time "Greatest Hits" classics - "The $389 Question."  Have a good weekend, and we'll see you on Monday!

Aces Casino Blog: To Find Out Which Number Was "The Funniest Number On The Roulette Wheel," You Have To Go To The Right People. We Did Just That...

We just LOVE Scott Roeben.

And, if you ask yourself, "Who's That," you must not be a card-carrying member of the "Aces Casino College of Casino Game Knowledge."  You know!  SCOTT ROEBEN!  Come on, YOU remember him -- That's the man behind of of the wittiest, informative blogs on the planet -- "The Pulse Of Vegas Blog."   It's been around longer than WE have, and they were the unwitting "guiding influence" in what made the Aces Casino Blog what it is today.  Without him, we ain't US in this glorious blogosphere.  (Ed. Note: Translation, we must be stealing copy from him.  I'm sure that Caesars Entertainment is gonna LOVE you.. And "blogosphere" is not a word, we're not paying for that.)

So, one day, while checking out Scott's blog, we find a GREAT story about what some people had decided was "the funniest number on the Roulette wheel."  BOOM.  Instant curiosity.  Turns out that the piece is about one of my favorite entertainers in movies - Mel Brooks.  So, with permission from Mr. Roeben and his award-winning blog, we proudly bring you some of the hilarious excerpts from that funny, insightful blog (with an assist from the people at YouTube, of course).  Enjoy.....

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Everyone seems to have an opinion about what the luckiest number on a roulette wheel is. But here’s a fact about roulette you probably didn’t know: The funniest number on a roulette wheel is 32.

Now, we know what you’re thinking. It’s something along the lines of, “Despite your being an award-winning Las Vegas blog, which orifice did you extract that from?” Actually, we didn’t just make that up. The number 32 has been deemed the funniest number on a roulette wheel by none other than a group of the most acclaimed comedy professionals in the history of funny.

Ya gotta admit it - That's pretty funny.

One of the most lauded shows on television, ever, was “Your Show of Shows.” It starred Sid Caesar and Imogene Coca, and the show’s writing staff was a who’s-who of the greatest comedic inkslingers ever to put yucks to paper.  Back in 1996, the Writers Guild of America gathered the former “Your Show of Shows” (and “Caesars Hour”) writers for a free-wheeling panel discussion. The panelists included Mel Brooks, Neil Simon, Sid Caesar, Carl Reiner, Larry Gelbart, Mel Tolkin, Aaron Ruben, Danny Simon, Sheldon Keller and Gary Belkin.  (Ed. Note: Can you imagine having all of THOSE crazies on ONE stage?)

During their discussion, these masters of their comedic domain revealed they’d explored the question of which number on a roulette wheel is funniest, and landed upon 32. Take a look.

Best 1:42 I'll ever spend.

Ultimate insider trivia: After the Writers Guild event, the “Caesar’s Writers” panel was made available on VHS tape. The photo on the packaging was taken by none other than the "Pulse Od Vegas Blog," who served as the official photographer at the event. We are not making this up. Ah, the circularity of the universe. And don’t even get us started about the fact our roulette wheel photo, in a post about “Caesar’s Writers,” was taken at (wait for it) Caesars Palace.

So, now you know! Some always bet on red or black when they’re in Las Vegas, but this blog always bets on 32.

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Outstanding piece from our friend from Glitter Gulch.  That's all for now....We'll be back at the ol' keyboard on Thursday with some actual thoughts of our OWN, this time, straight from the offices of Aces Casino, the orange county casino party leaders.  We're on a 72-hour break..... (Ed. Note: We're not paying for THAT, either.)  See you then!

Aces Casino Blog: You'd Expect That The "World's Greatest Dice Roll" Would Have Taken Place in Las Vegas, Right? (Greenland Was My Second Guess...)

Anyone that hangs around the offices of Aces Casino Entertainment knows that our Orange county casino party company LOVES crazy things -- Especially when they have to do with the casino games we love most.  Yes, It's true, the one time that we were fully enamored with the story about who had the biggest ball of twine WAS pretty crazy, but it just wasn't "Casino Game Crazy."

Well...That was then, and this is NOW.  Not only have we found something that's "Crazy," It's fully "Casino Game Crazy."  Plus, as an added bonus, we can BET on it here in the office!  It's THREE TIMES the FUN!  (Ed. Note: Surprisingly upbeat words, coming from a crew that bets who buys lunch for the day on what time the mailman will come.  These people will bet on ANYTHING.)

Now, the bad news.... You can only use this once.

You'll see why.

You see, we can only do this once because the dice we're using are special.  VERY special.  The dice we've found were constructed by a company called GNUF.  How special ARE they, you ask?  OK, Try this on for size -- The dice we're using for the "roll of the century" are more than 7 feet tall, and weigh about 1200 pounds each, due to their steel reinforced structure.  Ya gotta love it... These guys from GNUF are as wacky as WE are.  Who else would try to roll dice that weigh a combined 1.2 tons?  And that begs ANOTHER question -- Where in Hades do you take 1.2 tons of 7-foot dice and ROLL them?  I could hardly wait to see the table that'd hold 'em...

Well, it turns out that a table wouldn't be feasible, but the GNUF company found a steep, snowy hill is Nuuk, Greenland, that they could use for the "table," and they'd transport these dual monsters by way of a special helicopter.  Here, see for yourself, in this great YouTube footage we found on the subject...

 Fasten your seat belts, shooter coming out.

What, you thought I was KIDDING?  Uh-uhh.... Nope, there's the proof, These GNUF "scientists" decided to create the "World's Greatest Diceroll," all 7 feet of it, and 1.2 tons worth.  Now, we've scoured the earth and pestered the people at GNUF for a while now, trying to find out all the details of this legendary diceroll.  How many times did you roll the dice, did you shoot them on multiple mountains, et cetera....Well, come to find out, as you can imagine, GNUF's top minds came to the conclusion that because of the sheer size of these dice, they were only gonna shoot 'em ONCE.  Makes sense to me, when you consider the going rate for an hour of helicopter service in Greenland.  That's gotta be costly...

Well, now, it has come down to this.  GNUF only rolled these two dice down that mountain ONCE, so place your bets.  36 different combinations are on the dice, and this one roll turns out to be totally random.  (Ed. Note: No, we didn't send out a boxman with the world's biggest micrometer to check them.  We'll take their word for it, they're "legal.")

The big day came when the "shooter was coming out," one roll for all the money.  The staff at Aces Casino, the top Orange county casino party company on the west coast (and the goofiest crew anywhere) pooled their money, put it down on the table, and made their picks as to what number they thought would be rolled on that snowy winter day in Nuuk, Greenland.  This literally was the shot heard 'round the world.  Money changed hands, and we all got a kick out of it.

Now it's time for you to play at home.  What number are you expecting?  Yes, for reference, I did choose a 7.  Hey, six ways to make it, I wanted the chalk on this shot.  OK, It's time -- Scroll down and play the videotaped result below when all bets are in....Here we go....

 

And the winning number IS.....

I'm tellin' ya... Is THAT the wackiest thing that you've EVER seen?  We love it.  GNUF is instantly in the Aces Casino Entertainment Hall Of Fame.  I hope they go through with their idea of the world's biggest Roulette wheel.  If they do, we're there.  If we can do the biggest ball of twine, we certainly could do THAT, I don't care if it IS Greenland.  (Ed. Note: Yeah, right.  You get cold just watching the winter olympics on TV.)

We'll be back on Monday with still more foolishness from the Aces Blog.... Until then, keep those normal-size dice hot, and have a good weekend!

Aces Casino Blog: The Latest Dirt on SkyVue v. High Roller, The Las Vegas Version of "Wheel Of Fortune"

Here at Aces Casino, we love being known as the "Go-To Guys" when it comes to two distinctly different topics -- The Orange county casino night party scene, and off-beat news stories and videos.  Hey, It's who we are.  I mean, who else in the Orange county casino party company business in SoCal do you know that publishes a twice-weekly blog like this?  Exactly.  (Ed. Note: Yes, and we're the only ones goofy enough to do it, as well, but that's a story for another day.)

Today, in the Aces "Parakeet Paper," we thought it best to return to the ongoing saga of the Las Vegas version of "Wheel Of Fortune," namely, the battle between "SkyVue" and "High Roller," two warring factions of Ferris / Observation Wheel construction crews currently racing to build and operate the first of its' kind in Glitter Gulch.  For those Aces Casino Blog readers that haven't kept up with the "breakneck pace" of news surrounding this story, you can find our links to past Pulitzer-worthy prose on the subject from our blog here. (Ed. Note: This is actually our third article on this particular subject, which must mean we're all out of original ideas.)

First up, the Challenger -- SkyVue, who, as they say in horse racing lingo, "broke slowly from the gate" when certain financial troubles surfaced that caused some contractors to threaten lawsuits over non-payment late in 2012. (Ed. Note: Believe me, nothing turns you into the 'Challenger' around here faster than a short stack.)  But that was then, and this is now.  Let's take a picturesque look at how the ol' SlyVue is coming along, shall we?  First up, here's a picture of the SkyVue construction site from January of this year...

We've nicknamed this site the "SkyVue Base-Jumping Site."

Those two lil' guide posts, or whatever you want to call 'em, have been basically the body of work, as far as we could tell, up to that point six months ago.  Now, let's take a look at what's happening at SkyVue Camp today, courtesy of the now-ready and fully-functioning "SkyVue Webcam."  Check it out (Ed. Note: While you CAN, if you know what I mean), if you look closely at the WebCam site, you can see automobile traffic flowing to and fro in the background, and on the day we wrote this, there were actually people up on one of the posts, doing something....

This picture was taken from the WebCam TODAY.

Now, I'm usually one of those optimist-types, a "glass-is-half-full" kind of a guy.  But I have to tell you, I can't see too much of ANYTHING happening in today's webcam broadcast that wasn't already done in late 2012.  Let's turn to the Aces Casino "Game Theory, Odds and Probabilities" Division for their input on this situation... In their expert opinion, at the going rate of contraction now taking place at their construction site, our team predicts that the SkyVue Observation Wheel will be 100% completed by late October, 2063. 

Uhh, yeah, we're suddenly a little less optimistic concerning our chances of riding this thing any time soon.   So, the first question that came to THIS reporter's mind was, "Why is construction moving so slowly on SkyVue?  I see people up there on the top of the site...What are those construction workers DOING up there?"  Well, never let it be said that the top Orange County casino party company on the West Coast doesn't do the follow-up.  We sent an Aces Casino reporter up in the SkyVue elevator with a camera to see just what was going on.  Here's his exclusive footage, courtesy of our buddies at YouTube....

I knew they were doing SOMETHING up there.

OK, so much for SkyVue...Let's move on to the High Roller, the "Crown Jewel" of Caesars Entertainment's new construction site to be known as "The Linq."  Progress on the High Roller Observation Wheel, as well as the $550M "Linq" project, can be tracked at the "Linq," provided here.  Let's post a picture taken from that website, taken thru their WebCam system, earlier today....

 Looks like things are progressing nicely.  Where's my ticket?

We're taking a sabbatical out to Las Vegas later this month to do a little business for the company (Ed. Note: Yeah, like schmoozing with your buddies on company time), so we'll do our best to get some pics and footage of these two monsters in person, to see how things are going.  Also, I'm sure that Scott Roeben of "Pulse of Vegas Blog" fame has some insight on this story, as well.  WE'll ask.  So far, so good, we can't wait to ride one of these observation wheels.  Our pick to win this race is still the High Roller, but you never know....

That's all from the Aces Blog today.   We'll return to this story when it looks like one of the two wheels "starts going with the spokes."  That's when things will begin to get interesting.   Before then, we've got Thursday's upcoming edition of the Blog, which is sure to have very little in the way of useful info.  We'll see you then, have a good week!

Aces Casino Blog: Four Simple Words That Send Chills Up And Down The Spine Of Every Aces Staff Member At An Event - "I've Got This System..."

It was yet another typical Orange County casino party hosted by Aces Casino -- It's a weekend in 2011, time for another huge fundraiser in South Orange County.  Hosting this particular evening is Children's Hospital of Orange County (CHOC), one of the top organizations in the southern California area when it's time to raise funds for one of the many needy charities that they support.

The high-octane din of a fully entertained crowd here to take in this special event is matched by the clicking of fake casino chips in the background.  Everybody's having a wonderful time, especially the staff here at Aces Casino.... We love seeing another one of the many organizations that we serve on a yearly basis fulfilling their fundraising needs with a spectacular Orange County casino night.

Then, just like casino clockwork, "IT" happens.  AGAIN.  Just like it does at virtually EVERY Orange County casino night we put on for our clients.

While standing at the Roulette table and discussing the current plight of our totally destroyed NCAA College Basketball Tourney brackets with one of our top Roulette dealers, a well-dressed man walks up to the table and says it.

"Hi, guys!  I'm here to play some Roulette, and I'm here on a mission.  You see, I've got this system that I've been working on in order to prove that this game is mathematically beatable...."

"Stop right there, my friend,"  I tell the well-dressed gentleman.  "Such a system does not exist, but you're more than welcome to try it out.  This is the perfect way to test ANY system that a gaming enthusiast comes up with, to give it a true test without actually wagering any real money."  (I wish I had $5 for every time I've repeated that dopey phrase at an Aces Casino event.  I'd be sipping Pina Coladas on that private island that Disney bought for their luxury cruise lines that frequently visit the Bahamas, and taking in the sights.  Sip-=Sip.)

Undaunted, the Well-dressed event attendee plunks down two $100-fake-chips, and receives his fake Roulette chip change.  He's ready to test his 'system.'  "OK, here goes," he tells us, and he begins to place chips in certain spots on the board.

"I'll tell you what," I say to him.  (His name was Kevin.)  "Kevin, you currently have 40 red-striped chips in front of you.  If you can last 20 minutes at this table betting your system withour fail, and still have ANY of the $200 in chips you started with, I'll make a $50 donation to the OCSD's charity that benefits from tonight's fundraiser.  But, if you were to LOSE your initial stake before the 20 minutes expires, YOU can make a donation of any size you wish to the same charity.  You game?"

He was.  Game on.

And, 13 minutes later, Kevin was off to the registration table, in order to make the agreed-upon charitable donation to CHOC Hospital of Orange County.  (He actually couldn't lose.  I made my donation later, anyway.  I always do, but, I digress.)

That's when Scott Percifield, the Roulette dealer for the OCSD event, turned to me and said, "there goes another system player.  How many in a row is that?"

"I dunno, but better for Kevin to find out at our fake game table that his system may be a bit flawed, than to test it out on the REAL ones in Las Vegas, my friend," I respond.  "And, it's also good for CHOC Hospital."

And herein lies the tale, my friends.  You wouldn't BELIEVE how many times we run into the dreaded "system players" at our event; players that feel they've properly tested their lil' system online, and wish to try it it a pseudo-realistic casino environment for the first time to give it the true acid-test it deserves. And, what better place to try this system out than our very own Orange County casino party venue? 

We've been lucky enough to keep an un-scientific chart at our Aces Casino offices as to just how many times we've run into system players at our tables over the last 19+ years.  Our loosely-based count sits at 1265 players that have tested "systems" as we write this drivel.  Our record vs. these "system players?"

1256 wins, and NINE losses.

And, of those nine losses, six of them should be thrown out of the model.

-- Two Blackjack card-counting teams were found to be cheating, by passing cards to each other during their 20-minute test;

-- One Roulette gal bet her entire wad on red for the last spin of the test, deviating from her 'system;'

-- One Pai-Gow Poker player borrowed chips from another player during his testing;

-- And not one, but TWO Craps system players stopped their test with more than five minutes remaining, when they were up by $5 or less.

So, THREE winners in over 1200 tests.  Now we know why the Vegas hotels are so tall.

Bruce Willis was trying a "system" during one of our biggest private parties aboard the Queen Mary at this Hollywood "Wrap" Party.  The Blackjack table he was playing at ended up being thrown over the side.  He's one of the 1,096. 

Seems like EVERYONE has a system.  Just not a good one.  So, we here at Aces Casino have decided to take the initiative, and try to debunk the three biggest wastes of time when it comes to "systems" that players try at our full-sized, beautiful casino tables. Hey, we LOVE systems.  just not THESE three, in reverse order, that seem to pop up more than the rest...

#3 -- Craps Field Bets - 7 Winners, And Only 4 Losers

This play at the Craps table is the one we like to call, "The Used Car Lot of Craps."   Boy, if those "field bets" at the Craps tables don't look like a sweet deal....  You mean, I get ALL of those numbers in the field?  2-3-4-9-10-11-12?  SEVEN numbers, and there are only FOUR numbers (5, 6, 7, and 8) that are losers?

It's just so easy to understand... Even the novice Craps player can understand this bet, one we like to call a "one-roll proposition."  That means, on the very next roll of the dice, we'll have the winner (or the loser) when it comes to the Field bet.  If one of the previously mentioned numbers showing in the Field box is rolled, you're a winner.  (If 2 or 12 is rolled, the Field bet pays double.)  If 5-6-7-or 8 comes up, the Field bet loses.

Yep...Unfortunately, we're talking about a used-car lot that uses dice when it comes to the Field bet.  On a used-car lot, you can ask to see the "CarFax."  We suggest that when you consider making a Field bet, that you first check out the "CrapsFax."  If you HAD, you'd find out one very interesting fact about the Field bet: Every time you place a Field bet on a Craps table, the house edge against the player is a whopping 5.59%.

Compare that with the traditional basic Craps system that suggests that you play the pass line and take full odds on any point number created to try to get the best of it (only a 1.12% house edge), and you can see why we like to compare the Field bet in Craps to watching The "Teletubbies" on TV; Just because it's easy to understand doesn't mean it's any good.

Yeah, I'm the character that says turn it off.

Sorry, Tinky-Winky.  We suggest you steer clear of the Field bet (AND The Teletubbies).  Either way you look at it, there are better places to put your money, like odds bets and "Transformers."  (Ya gotta admit, Transformers are cool.)

#2 -- "9 straight Black numbers - The next one HAS to be RED!"

We see this one all the time at Aces Casino.  The number of consecutive spins may be different, but the flawed theory remains the same.  "Wow, ANOTHER black number.  That's NINE in a ROW.  A red number is due!  Bet it all on Red!"

 "Soitenly, the next one's GOTTA be RED!"

Whap.  Black 15.  10-in-a-row.

Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, my casino party friends, but the Roulette wheel and the ball that falls into a slot in the wheel have no idea that they've now landed on 10 straight black numbers.  The odds of a red number coming up on a traditional 38-spot Roulette wheel don't change because of the previous 10 spins.  The odds are just like always.  18/38.

Forget Faux-Casino Parties.   We've seen people in LAS VEGAS betting this same way, thinking the other color is "due."  Why else do you think the casinos added those "Roulette previous spins" tote boards, that show the last X-number of results?  They did it to bring in those "system players" that think the other color is "due."  Nothin' is due but the rent, my friends.  18-out-of-38.  Same odds, spin after spin.  Don't be fooled.

#1 -- The Dreaded "Martingale" System

This one is the all-time champion of flawed systems.  Time after time, we'll see players try this.  Simply put, the Martingale System states that, should you lose your original bet, just double up the next time.  lose again? double up again.  You're DUE to win one eventually, and that way, you'll break even+ one bet when you DO win.

Flaws are all OVER this "system."

The biggest flaw when it comes to the Martingale is when the losses mount so much that you've hit the maximum bet amount at the table.  You can't continue the double-up system.  The bets are over the maximum.  THEN what?  Uhhh, BOOM, is what.

THESE guys were Martingale system players.

I know, it sounds like you'd NEVER hit the maximum table limit on a regulation casino Blackjack table.  You can...either that, or you're going to be faced with seven losses in a row at a $20 table, and will need to bet a whopping $1280 on your next hand of Blackjack just to try to get EVEN.  Try and place a $1000 + bet on a Blackjack table, my friends.  It'll give your knees the shakin' of their lives.  oh, and lose THAT hand, and your next bet is over $2500.  Pass-a-dena on the Martingale, my friends.  It sounds good, but it's a killer.

(Whew) Well, that's all for the top 3 flawed betting systems....(Ed. Note: Hopefully.)

Not convinced yet?  Hey... Just come on down to the next Orange County casino party that Aces Casino is hosting in your area, and give that Martingale system another try.  We can use another 'statistic' on our dry-erase board.  Care to make it 1,257?

Aces Casino Blog: Our 3 Favorite Amazing, Amusing and Confusing News Stories - The May 2013 Edition (Starring Hitler Teapots & Mystery Diners Fraud!)

 

Here at Aces Casino Entertainment, also known as the best Orange county casino party company on the west coast, we strive to follow one simple rule when it comes to local, regional and/or national news --Truth is SO much stranger than fiction.

Seriously - When you see some story on TV, online or in print and you think to yourself, "you just can't make stuff like this up," that's when you know you've hit "Pulitzer gold," my friends.  Thankfully for the writers of this Aces Casino Blog parakeet paper, we've ALWAYS got something to write about when it comes to finding the most amazing, amusing and confusing news articles of any given month.

Without question, we LOVE crazy news articles.  The goofier, the better, we always say.   I'm sure the newspapers and media outlets love these lil' gems, and we do, too.

So, without further fanfare, let's chronicle the top 3 news stories of May 2013, as selected by our fully under-qualified staff here at Aces Casino Entertainment.....

#1 -- Frank Zappa was right - Don't eat that yellow snow

We found this golden news nugget from Houston Texas, where it appears that the training given to the vendors inside the Houston Astros Minute Maid Park leaves a little something to be desired. The Astros released a statement late Wednesday addressing a Ch. 2 report about a Minute Maid Park food vendor bringing snow cones into a stadium restroom Monday.

A cellphone video clip shows the snow cones on the bathroom floor, next to a stall being used by the vendor. According to Ch. 2, the video was taken by a person who attended Kansas City’s 6-5 victory against the Astros on Monday at Minute Maid.  Astros president Reid Ryan said in a statement the organization was notified Monday by ARAMARK, who handles the stadium’s food services, about the incident and the third-party employee was immediately terminated.

Oh, and just in case you missed the best line of the story, it would have to come from newly-promoted team GM Reid Ryan (son of Angels' pitcher Nolan Ryan), who let off this gem -- “This isolated incident was a clear violation of our food safety practices and is not reflective of our standards,” Ryan said.

Gee, we sure hope so.  Too late, though, Reid -- I'll never look at another sno-cone the same way, ever again.  Oh, and for those of you that know we go the extra mile to cover these stories, here is the actual cell-phone footage of the "incident."  You KNOW we'd find it.

"Daddy, why is steam coming off of the top of my sno-cone?"

#2 --Scripted Reality TV?  Oh, Say Not So.... (Alternate Working Title: Ummm, Which Side Of The Family Are You From, Again?)

If you know ANYTHING about this Orange county casino night party company at all, you KNOW that the crew here at Aces Casino LOVES reality TV.  All KINDS of it.  Unfortunately, as you may have heard, there are some "reality TV" shows that play fast and loose with the term, "Reality."  This appears to be the case with a fairly new show on the satellite dish called "Mystery Diners."   We first caught wind of a possible shark-jumping on this show when we saw a recent clip of "Mystery Diners," and thought the people on that show acted a little, shall we say, "wooden."  (They can't act.)

A recent episode, entitled "All In The Family," may have opened Pandora's "YouTube" box this week when a nasty, obscene waitress that claims to be a member of the immediate family of the owner showed up on the show.  Going by the name of "Dee Dee," this horrible excuse for a wait staff member literally does a number on the show.  Rude comments to fellow waitresses, snotty dialogue between her and her customers, and even defiling a customer's sandwich when he had earlier complained about the service by placing the sandwich in-between her breasts before serving it to him won her the "horrible service staff member of the year" honors.

One problem, though.  "Dee Dee" looks like someone that works in the entertainment industry.  Someone that we KNOW.  At press time, we're working on this story, and checking our facts before we go any further, but this little episode might blow the lid off "Mystery Diners," should it be proven true.  We'll get the pictures, the vids, and ultimately the scoop on this situation, and the minute we're ready, we'll give it all to our vast (4?) legion of followers.  Stay tuned.  (Ed. Note: Wow...REAL news?  You don't get paid extra for this, son.)

It's official.  If it's on the internet, it must be true.  (Or not.)

UPDATE --  Checkmate.  The show is fully scripted.  One of our team remembered Deenie Castleberry at an event we did about one year ago.  It turns out that she's the same "Dee Dee" that appears as a faux-family member in the Mystery Diners Episode entitled "All In The Family."  Talked to her yesterday, she's "Dee Dee."  Oh, and she had one other revelation -- Another acquaintance of ours, actor Tommy O'Brien (Find him at his IMDB.com link provided) appeared as a thief in a year 3, episode 4 broadcast entitled, "Catch of the Day." We're sooooo disappointed.  Tommy and Deenie are pretty good in the show, though.  Hope it helps their careers.

Funny thing... IMDB and the "Diners" keep deleting our pictures of the two "stars" we've outed, but there's no deleting Tommy O;Brian's appearance credit on his bio as "The Thief."  That's "Game Over," Food Network.  Come clean now, or else we send in Samy and Amy B., and you don't want THAT.

We're calling out a full "B.S." on "Mystery Diners."  The only mystery to be solved is which agent is getting 10% for his/her client to appear on the show.  Good job by the actors, snow job by the show...

#3 --"Hitler Teapot" has SoCal Commuters Steamed

First off, I have to admit that I never saw the billboard that everyone is yakking about, which (I'm told) towers over the 405 freeway near Culver City, but I sure as Hades had heard of all the ruckus.  Well, here are the pics and vids, judge for yourself...

Seriously?

Anyone that wonders how eyewitnesses to major crimes in SoCal can botch up even the easiest description of the perpetrators can rest easy, as of now.  Answer -- We're all blind as bats.  We have one of these tea kettles in our house.  I never noticed the resemblance to Adolf Hitler (because there isn't one), but I noticed a few days ago that the kettle always starts steaming every time I put French Fries or French Bread next to it.  Nah, It's gotta be a coincidence.


BONUS VIDEO -- Braves' Fan Goes "Gangnam Style"

You KNOW we always have an extra vid for those of you that can't get enough.  Let's lighten things up with a little guy that was spotted in-between innings at a recent Atlanta Braves home game.  This is too funny.... He's got the moves....

Psy needs to get into the exercise-video biz.  I get tired just watching it.

Aces Casino Blog: We Answered The Call From Our Readers! Here are 2 Great Video Poker Game Trainers

Question: When does the month of May look like the month of June?

Answer -- When the Aces Casino Blog stretches their "Let's Play Games" series of useful casino game trainers past LAST month, and into THIS month.  (Ed. Note: And, no, you don't get paid extra for making the "Games" series into a two-month article.)  But that's GOOD news for all (6?) of our readers -- we still have one "LPG" entry left!

It should go without saying by now, that here at Aces Casino Entertainment, we just LOVE games - All kinds of games, from the traditional casino games that can be found in just about any reputable Las Vegas-based casino, to the various card and board games found at your local card shop and department store.  Bottom line -- When you're the top Orange county casino party company on the west coast, and the word "entertainment" is in your name, you had best know the Las Vegas gaming business.

And, without question, we DO.  (Ed. Note: They love YouTube, too, but that's another story.)

The best news of all in this shameless brag from the Aces Casino "Ministers of Propaganda" is that we ALSO love to SHARE our good fortune with our many clients up and down the California coast.  That's why our Aces Blog, A.K.a. the "Parakeet Paper," is such a useful tool -- We can interact not only with our many on-site orange county casino party clients at one of our many live fundraising and private party events, but also with people that find us right here on our blog.

So, to that end, the team at Aces Casino Entertainment have decreed that the month of May this year will be known as "Let's Play Games" month here on the blog.  Every Monday and Thursday here on the blog this month, we'll post a great link to one of the many fine Las Vegas-style casino game trainers for our fans to play with and try out.  Take one of our many game trainers for a spin, and see if you like the games, without the sting of playing for real money.

Last but certainly not least in our "Let's Play Games" May series of game trainers is our double-dip of video poker sims -- First up, the traditional style of Video Poker (Jacks or Better), followed by a popular hybrid of the game, "Deuces Wild Video Poker."  Pick your poison, they're right below for your enjoyment, just click on the image of your choice, and have a blast...

Traditional Video Poker Awaits..

And our hybrid, "Deuces Wild Video Poker."

Man, that was a fast month+.  That'll do it for our "Let's Play Games" series of popular game trainers.... Next up, It's back to the irreverent style that all of our readers are so used to from this bunch of Orange County casino party CRAZIES known as Aces Casino.  (And NO, I'm NOT paying back that $1.6M I lost.)
OK, time to do what we do best -- Irreverent, useless news!  Next up in the batters box?  Why, of course, It's time for our top 3 "amazing, amusing and confusing news stories from the past month.  That includes our official nod for outing "Mystery Diners."  You KNOW you love it... (Ed. Note: And yes, they have too much time on their hands.)   We'll see you back here on Monday with THAT craziness, have a GREAT weekend!

Aces Casino Blog: "The Minute That We Saw The Title Of That Show ("Kitchen Nightmares"), We Knew It Was Going to Be Spectacular! (We Had NO Idea.)

You HAVE to love Television.

At Aces Casino Entertainment, the Orange county casino party leader since 1994, we LOVE TV, especially out-of-nowhere hits that spring up on TV.  For years, our staff has always loved to pick their favorite TV shows of any given year and post them in the Aces Blog, and of course, yours truly chimes in with his 2 cents-worth for the Aces Parakeet Paper.  But every once in a while, some show that we've rarely heard from steps up to the plate and blasts a game-winning, grand slam home run.

And, last month, on May 10, Fox TV's "Kitchen Nightmares" cleared the bases.

If you haven't heard about it, a TV crew with a world-renowned chef wandered into a Scottsdale, Arizona restaurant, by request of the owners.  The husband and wife team was chagrined that business was down, and they couldn't figure out why.

After watching the "Kitchen Nightmares" episode featuring these two owners, Amy and Samy Bouzaglo, it seemed to become quite apparent as to what may have gone wrong with recent situations involving their restaurant, "Amy's Baking Company."  For those lucky enough to not have heard of this legendary internet snafu involving these two, or also for those that have the time to live out this classic TV meltdown here today, the entire "Kitchen Nightmares" episode is shown below.  We call it, "43 minutes of bliss," with no commercial interruption.  Bon Appetit.

I'm not leaving a tip, because the wait staff wouldn't get it, anyway. 

 I know... It's just internet gold.  Now, believe us when we tell you that we've wrestled with our posting of this particular episodic situation that must surely climax in the closing of the restaurant (Ed. Note: We have an 'out of business' pool here at Aces Casino.  I've got July 19.), and if we should glorify this unfortunate handling of a touchy situation by our restauranteurs.  It's like kicking someone when they're down...

Ahh, the heck with it.  We're posting it.  

We've all had bosses like this that have gotten away with murder, slumlord-types that had US washing their cars, and tossing verbal abuse at us day after day.  It isn't right, but for all of us that were waiting for the day when the nasty bosses faced the Karma, it looks like the day of restaurant reckoning is coming fairly soon.  We actually wish Amy and Samy well.  

True story.  

We'd LOVE to see them try to hang on, and turn that Scottsdale location into a working restaurant "museum" of sorts.  I mean really, how cool would it be to actually sit in that restaurant at the 50-yard-line, and watch this dysfunctional eatery implode on a nightly basis, as they kick out customer after customer for insulting those rubber-tire pies??  Please, PLEASE tell me we haven't heard the last of the Saddam Hussein clone and his cat-lady wife.

Update:  Bad news for the Aces Casino employees that had May 21 in the "out of business" pool.  The restaurant re-opened that evening, although the supposed press conference that the twosome promised was scuttled, because FOX-TV stepped in and threatened sanctions if the pair denigrated the network.  And, at $100K per violation, that's a lot of cat food and frozen raviolis, baby..

Of course, should any further updates appear before this blog entry from Aces Casino Entertainment, the top Orange county casino party company on the west coast (and lover of frozen raviolis) makes it's print appearance, we'll be sure to post it here.

That's all for now...(I suppose.)  We'll be back next time with another scintillating worthless blog entry from the top casino night party company in SoCal..... 

And, to Amy and Samy, we wish you good luck in your business.  

Why?  Simple.  I got September 16 in the pool. 

Aces Casino Blog Complaint Department: Hey! How Come We Didn't See Any Of This 21st-Century Gaming Technology in the Movie "Back To The Future Part 2?"

Sometimes, it can be a tough job to "slip one by the goalie" here at the top Orange County casino party company on the West coast, that company known as Aces Casino Entertainment, but it DOES happen.  Every once in a blue moon, something from the gaming industry in general just appears out of nowhere, something that catches us totally by surprise, something we did not know existed.  (Ed. Note: Especially when it comes to the treats sold in the break room vending machines, but that's a story for another time.  Who told the vending machine guys to 'go healthy,' anyway?  Bleh...)

We begin this Monday's quasi-effort in the Aces Casino Blog by quoting the esteemed Dr. Alan Grant, a character played by Sam Neill in the 1993 Steven Spielberg blockbuster movie, "Jurassic Park" --"The world has just changed so radically, and we're all running to catch up."  This was the instant feeling that this reporter had when we saw a picture of a machine that looked like a kiosk for some movie rental company, like a RedBox, or a Blockbuster Express machine..

Paging Mr. Tannen... Mr. Biff Tannen.....

This picture comes to us from one of our favorite (if not THE favorite) blog websites, something called the "Pulse Of Vegas Blog," a 4-year-old blog written and produced by a man named Scott Roeben for the Caesars Entertainment corporation.  More on that later....Now, back to the picture....

Now, upon further scrutiny (not to mention Scott's copy from the blog), we quickly discovered that you'd be out of luck trying to rent a copy of "Life Of Pi" from this machine, but if you were looking to place a wager on the upcoming Angels' baseball game, you'd be in the right place.

That photo shows none other than the Quad's new "Sports Betting Kiosk," conveniently located across from the Quad Wine & Spirits, in the hotel's new casino area. 

Ummm... Excuse me?  A SPORTS BETTING KIOSK?   Are you tellin' me that in this world that we live in, there's some machine that you can place sports bets on with no cigar-chomping old man mumbling our selections back to us?   Well, to say the least, this by-chance discovery set the proverbial wheels in motion over here at Aces Casino.   How can this BE, we wondered.  None of us had EVER heard of this lil' piece of heaven even existing in Vegas, or anywhere else, for that matter.  We had to perform some instant research on this marvel, right away.  So, without further adieu, we went right to our "Gold Standard" source for futuristic, state-of-the-art casino stuff, to find out the truth about this sports wagering leviathan -- The ONLY place we'd EVER go to find out the truth about 21st-century wagering like this....

Our "Go-To" source?  Why, It's our DVD of "Back To The Future, Part Two," of course.

I mean, that movie was set in the year, what, 2015?  I mean, surely, there HAS to be a shot of this 21st-century gaming marvel sitting somewhere in the background footage shot inside of Biff's Casino (Ed. Note: which, we might add, looked VERY familiar to those of us that had frequented the Union Plaza Hotel and Casino some years back).  We must have watched that part of the movie some 20 times yesterday, looking for this sports betting kiosk somewhere, ANYWHERE, in ANY of the shots of the interior of "Biff's."

Nope.  No dice.  It ain't there.  I mean, look for yourself.

Exhibit A - No Kiosk in THIS shot, But I think that's Billy Zane in the hat.  Could be wrong.

 Exhibit B - The Lost "Biff Tannen Museum" Footage from the film.  We go the extra mile.

Well, when you think about it, this must mean that our Michael J. Fox / Christopher Lloyd "21st-Century Las Vegas Masterpiece" film MUST be truly ahead of it's time.  The FILM is set in 2015, two years AFTER our current year that we live in, so we think that those machines must now be old news in the year 2015, and THAT'S why you don't SEE them in the film.  (Ed. Note: We call this 'Aces Casino Logic.'  Don't ask.)  Hey, you know how Las Vegas keeps their promise of "out with the old, and in with the new."  Wow...Robert Zemeckis is truly a visionary, after all.

And so goes the logic of the bloggers of Aces Casino Entertainment, the best Orange County casino night party company on the west coast.  And the city of Norwalk wanted me to serve on jury duty last year.  I'm sure that by now, they're thankin' their lucky stars that this reporter wasn't available, or a miscarriage of justice wouldn't have been far off.

And now, the epilogue to our cryptic blog for this Monday.... Back when the powers that be decided that Aces Casino Entertainment should have a blog to promote not only the company, but all things "Vegas," we thought to ourselves, "OK, if we're going to DO this, we're going to do it OUR way - With a smirk on our faces, and an uplifted brow."  You know, something to show this supposed "irreverent" side that we're supposed to have (Ed. Note: and have won awards for in our industry).

We went looking on the 'Net, searching far and wide for a blog that spoke to us in a language we could understand.  Then, suddenly, there it was.... We found the "Pulse Of Vegas Blog."   Once we read Scott Roeben's blog and found he had a similar sense of humor about the way his blog should look and feel, we knew how to proceed.  THAT'S how the Aces Casino Blog was going to look, and more importantly, THINK.  We already had that style at our many events, so we thought, "Hey - Why not bring that style to the printed page of our parakeet paper?"

Voila.  The Aces Blog was born....May 1, 2009.

We'll attempt to thank Scott Roeben personally for his long-distance shove into this crazy blog world that we now reside in, if at all possible.  We'll be traveling to Las Vegas in late June for a business trip related to both the blog AND Aces Casino, so we'll try to contact the blog-meister of the "Pulse Of Vegas Blog" and see if we can take him out to lunch, or something.  (Ed. Note: Just come back with the Roulette wheel we ordered, Mister Pulitzer.  We're not paying for your trip to Vegas to go schmooze!)  Hey -- If we can travel to Minnesota for a "big ball of twine tournament," we surely can do lunch in Vegas. 

Oh.  One more thing.  Scott takes good pictures, MUCH better than OUR team.  Here's a shot of the Britney Spears look-alike that's currently performing in the Flamingo Hotel and Casino's 30th Anniversary of the "Legends In Concert....."

Yeah..Britney WISHES she looked like this.

And, yes, a quick note to the powers that be over at Aces Casino Entertainment, the top Orange County casino party company in SoCal -- In True "Pulse Of Vegas Blog" form, we're sure we've taken care of acquiring the normal release forms required for our publication today.  Do we seem like the type of blog that wouldn't get the release forms?

(Ed. Note: Sigh.........)