Monday, April 29, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: From Our "Goofing Off At Work" Division, Here Are Our Selections For The Greatest YouTube Videos Ever Made (The YouTube Oscars?)


(Ed. Note: Right up front, it should be said that while our Aces Casino Entertainment crew might be a combination of incredibly entertaining AND unabashedly irreverent, there's no DOUBT that our crew is, hands-down, the finest casino party company staff in the business.  Don't let their writing style fool you.  They're talented, and committed to serving our southern California clients that strive for the finest in casino night party services.  They come in on their own time just to be around each other, and write for the Aces Casino blog on their own time.  They're special.  Unfortunately, that doesn't mean you all get a raise.  Get back to work!)

When you have the word "Entertainment" right smack dab in the middle of your business name, your individual tastes tend to gravitate towards the best in that same field of entertainment, no matter what the type or genre.  And, when it comes to the party crew over at Aces Casino Entertainment, widely known as the top orange county casino party crew on the west coast, well, you simply want the "best of the best," whether it be in our own chosen field of casino entertainment but ALL types of entertainment.  It's what makes Aces Casino who WE are - The best in the business, period.

Yes, It's true.  We LIVE to entertain our many clients here in southern California, but we also LOVE to be entertained ourselves.  Each and every year, our Aces Casino Christmas Party (Ed. Note: which, by the way, is held every March, due to event calendar restrictions in December) is one of the toughest to put together, because our team of casino crazies has seen it all.  But, at the end of the day, we always have fun at the venue that we invade for our annual bash.  We LOVE to have fun.  All kinds of fun.

That statement brings us to today's topic - Our latest addiction.  YouTube Videos. 

Come on, admit it.  Some of these videos submitted by some very creative people around the world are INCREDIBLY entertaining, so much so, that there is a person here at Aces Casino whose only job is to peruse the internet for first-class entertainment venues and businesses, along with entertaining ideas and videos.  She's pretty busy this year, and all because of what we call the "YouTube Factor."

Yeah, guilty as charged.  We can't get enough of these wild and crazy YouTube vids.

The GOOD news about all this is that this orange county casino party crew isn't selfish when viewing these funny videos.  We like to share our good fortune with our blog-readers.  So, to that end, Aces Casino, the top orange county casino night party crew on the West Coast, proudly presents our picks for what we'll call the "YouTube Oscars," A.K.A. "The Greatest YouTube Videos Ever Made."

#3 -- You, An Elevator, and a Coffin (?)

This Brazilian TV crew loves to spoof people that find themselves trapped in precarious situations, but THIS one takes the cake....Imagine that's YOU in this hilarious video montage...

We'll blame this on that show, "The Walking Dead."

#2 -- Personally, I prefer a "Sleep Number" Bed

I'm sensing an international trend here.  We move to a German comedy video team that found some willing participants in an unscheduled swim party with this ditty posted about a year ago....

Everybody in the Pool!

#1 -- The Brazilian Elevator Team Returns

This one was a unanimous selection as our favorite YouTube video submission of all time.  The same crew that came up with our #3 vid also was the producer of this well-planned, perfectly-executed prank on some unsuspecting elevator users......We're talkin' 64 million views, so we're not alone in our praise.

This is something OUR crew would think up.

As you can tell, we LOVE YouTube - The people that post to that popular video-sharing web site are some of the most creative people anywhere..... We know you love them, too - These blog entries are the most popular on OUR site, as well.  Wait - What's that you say?  You'd like a BONUS video?  OK... (See how easy we are?)

Bonus Video #4 - BREAKING NEWS - It wasn't Booth that got The President - It was Disneyland

Here's another classic home-movie-style video that answered the question, "What happens when something at Disneyland malfunctions?"  Well, I suppose, THIS happens....Enjoy!



That'll close out our April Blog-A-Thon for the month.  We'll be back on the first Thursday in May with another month of crazy, irreverent, and sometimes informative blog entries here on the Aces Casino parakeet paper.  Next up, we check in with those two observation wheel construction crews out in Vegas that are racing against each other in order to build the first operational "Super-Ferris Wheel."  Just how ARE they coming along, and when can we RIDE the darned thing?  Come on back, and check it out...Until then, take care, and have a good week!

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: New Casino Game Alert! Here's a Sneak-Peek At a New Game Entitled, "Pick-One 21"


It's a typical situation over here at Aces Casino Entertainment, also known as the best orange county casino party company on the west coast.  When it comes to new casino games coming out, it's either "feast or famine."  It seems like we'll go MONTHS without ANY new Las Vegas-style casino games to speak of, play-test or discuss.  Then, out of the blue, in three day's time, we go from nothing, to TWO new casino games hitting the board here at Aces Casino.  Last Monday, we got our hands on the Flamingo Hotel and Casino's newest edition to the gaming fleet, "Wild 52."  (Here's the link, if you missed it, courtesy of our blog partner-in-crime, Scott Roeben, of "The Pulse of Vegas" Blog.)  Today, we talk about another casino game making it's way onto the Las Vegas-style casino gaming scene....

Pick One 21!  (Yeah, we're not big on the logo, either.)

Now, "Pick-One 21" IS new to the Aces Casino gaming scene - But to our seasoned casino game veterans, this is not a new game at all.  According to our friends over at "The Wizard Of Odds," Pick-One 21 actually made it's debut back in 2001 at the now-defunct Sahara Hotel, where it lasted for about one year.  Earlier this year, however, the game has been resurrected, and is now appearing in (of all places) the WinStar World Casino in Thackerville, Oklahoma. It initially sounds like a lot of fun.  Here are the rules of the game....

The game is played with six Spanish decks. A Spanish deck is a 48-card deck, consisting of the usual cards, but excluding the four tens.
  1. All cards have the same point value as in blackjack, except that an ace is always one point.
  2. Play begins with each player making a wager.
  3. The dealer will then deal two cards each to a red hand and a blue hand. Each hand shall have one card face up and one face down.
  4. Based on the two face-up cards, the player must choose which hand to bet on. The player may bet on the red hand, blue hand or a tie. In addition, the player may double his wager if betting on the red or blue hand. The player will indicate his choice by pressing a button. If the player elects to double, then he must place the additional wager next to his original wager at this time.
  5. After all players have made their decisions, the dealer will turn over the face down cards. If the total points of the red hand are under 17, then the dealer will hit that hand until the total points are 17 or more. Then, the dealer will hit the blue hand in the same manner.
  6. The hand that comes closer to 21, without going over, shall win. As in blackjack, if one hand busts, and the other doesn't, then the non-busted hand wins. If both hands bust, then all wagers on red or blue lose. In the event of a tie, bets on red or blue shall push, except for premium match ups (see rule 10).
  7. A tie bet shall win if both hands have the same point value or both bust.
  8. A winning bet on red or blue shall pay even money and a winning bet on the tie shall pay 3 to 1.
  9. There are certain combinations of initial red and blue cards that strongly favor one side or the other. They are referred to as "premium match ups." If the player bets on a premium match up, and the hand results in a tie, then the bet shall lose. Premium match ups occur when one card is a 10 and the other is a 2 through a 9. A bet on the 10 in these situations is a premium match up and must beat the other hand to win; otherwise, it loses.
We kinda like that "Red/Blue" thing, so you know what THAT means - Road trip!  You know us here at the Aces Casino Blog - When your company motto is "This Beats Working," you can turn ANYTHING into a business trip.  Now, we're currently in the process of planning such a trip to Thackerville to watch this game called "Pick One 21" in action, with the actual date to be determined.  When we get the go-ahead, we'll broadcast it here on the parakeet paper.

Also, we already found a game trainer on "Pick One 21."  You can get it right here.  Just use the option to play located on the right-hand side of the screen, enter some goofy name, and play "Pick One 21."  It's that easy, courtesy of the "Kings of the Game Trainer," Aces Casino Entertainment.

We can't wait to see this game in motion down the road in Oklahoma, and we're sorry to see that we missed it's original debut back in 2001 at the Sahara.  But, you know what they say -- "Better late than never."  Hey, we have that game trainer, too.  We're good!

Well, that's all for now here on the Aces Casino Blog, but hold on to your hats - Your friends at the top orange county casino party company known as Aces Casino is planning a big "Blog-Splash" for our last Blog article  of the month - The Aces Casino "YouTube Oscars" are coming out!  On Monday, April 29, we'll post our fave YouTube Vids EVER.  You KNOW it'll be outrageous.... Have a good weekend, and we'll see you all back here on Monday!  (Ed. Note: No formal wear needed for the Aces YouTube Oscars....)

Monday, April 22, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: "Wild 52" Might Sound Like An Old Dennis Hopper Film, But Actually, It's a Brand New Casino Game Currently Appearing At The Flamingo


Any time the crew over at Aces Casino Entertainment finds out that there's a new casino game appearing somewhere in the city of Las Vegas, we're all over that new game like my dog is to an ice cream cup.  Hey, we're not the best orange county casino party company on the west coast for nothing.  Any time a new casino game debuts, It's a holiday over here at the Aces offices.  We LOVE new games, especially when you see them at a major Las Vegas Strip property like the Flamingo Hotel and Casino in Glitter Gulch.

Take a "Wild" guess at the name of this new game.  OK, cool sign.

This latest casino game hittin' Las Vegas is called "Wild 52," a game played with a 53-card deck - a normal deck of 52 cards, plus a Joker.  (Ed. Note: The term, "Joker," actually comes from the intended mispronunciation of the German word, "Juker," which is their version of Euchre.  You're not the only ones that have gaming in your blood.)  Now, we could post a huge cut-and-paste copy of the rules of how to play this new game (and we probably WILL, and the end of this blog), but we thought it would be better if a man named David, who is currently the best dealer of "Wild 52" at the Flamingo Hotel and Casino in Las Vegas, did the honors for us.  Take it away, David.

Ladies and gentlemen, meet David, the King of "Wild 52."

OK, I know what you're thinking.  There are a lot of new rules, and the situation surrounding the necessary qualification of the dealer cuts down on the odds of winning for the players, but you have to admit, it looks like a lot of fun. Now, it's important to note that the crew at the top orange county casino party in SoCal defines "fun" as "a casino game that doesn't kill the players with the house edge."  Unfortunately for us, our good friends at "The Wizard Of Odds" haven't fully play-tested this game.  

That's the BAD news.  The GOOD news is, our friends over at Collusion Analysis, the guys that look for edges in casino games to exploit a la the "Million Dollar Blackjack Crew" did a few hundred years ago, HAVE studied it.  I'll skip to the back page of their synopsis - They've determined that, when played correctly, the house edge should come out at about 1.2%.  I can  handle that.  What I CAN'T handle is how to play the game in the first place.

Well, you know what they say.  "Practice Makes Perfect."  To that end, the Aces Casino crew is planning to invade the Flamingo hotel and Casino in the next 30 days or so on what we'll define as a "business trip."  (Ed. Note: Yeah, right.  You guys have the best job in the world, admit it.)  We'll go and play this new casino game at length, and we'll report on our findings as soon as we can.  I'd say you can expect a blog report on "Wild 52" sometime in July.  In the meantime, here's the link for 'Wild 52' from the makers of this newest casino game with some info about their latest creation. 

The minute that we get our hands on a "Wild 52" game trainer, we'll post it here on our parakeet paper.  For now, that's all for another edition of the Aces Casino Blog from your friends at the best orange county casino night party company on the west coast, Aces Casino Entertainment.  We'll be back on Thursday with still ANOTHER brand new (but decades old) casino game that's making it's way back to the Las Vegas casino scene.  Come on back, and we'll see you on Thursday with the details!

Friday, April 19, 2013

Aces Casino Blog Special Report: Our Thanks To All Of Those That Helped Ease The Pain Of The Boston Marathon Bombings - All Of America Salutes You!


We're not going to blast away with our Aces Casino Propaganda machinery like we normally do here, my friends.  No sales pitch, nothing like that at all.  We just wanted to give thanks to all of the men, women and children of Boston, Massachusetts, and all of the many surrounding cities, towns and states that sent help to the city that needed it, so the healing could begin.  To all the law enforcement officials that put in countless hours of work putting all the pieces of the puzzle together to solve this heinous crime, all the volunteers, and all those fine people of Boston, Watertown, and all cities and towns in-between that we haven't named but are so deserving of praise, America salutes you.  Thank you for your service.  You make us all so proud.

We have events all day tomorrow, but this just could not wait another minute.  These two entries are what makes us so proud to be an American on this night, and all nights to come...

This.


.And THIS.

We will NEVER forget that scene from the rink in Boston....That's all.  We'll be back Monday.  Thank you so much, all of you that did that incredible job this week. You are what makes America great.

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: Time for April's Edition of "Stupid Criminals, Crazy Photos, and Dumb Wedding Pranks!"


Everybody within the sound of this Blog knows what the wacky crew over at Aces Casino Entertainment, well-known as the top Orange county casino party company in SoCal, does best in this crazy world we live in - Putting on fabulous, entertaining, one-of-a-kind casino night parties(Ed. Note: Seriously, we ARE that good.  I mean, who ELSE in our industry has a four-year-old blog that posts articles twice a week?  That's Check-Mate.)  However, what some people that don't partake in this parakeet paper we call the Aces Casino Blog might NOT know about us is simply this - We LIVE for goofy movies, stories, ideas and pictures to pass on ro our many (4?) blog subscribers.  When we're not out making some worthy fundraising chair a bazillion dollars for their very important charitable organization, we're out looking for the next "Pet Rock" of Blog-info to pass along a starving contingency of Aces Blog readers.

OK, maybe we don't need room in our trophy case for that ever-elusive Pulitzer, but hey, It's something to do while the construction and design crew is out in the back, making so much noise that no one can hear anything, while they build the next outstanding piece of casino equipment for our company.

Bottom line: Any time we come across something that has to be shared with the masses, we write another blog article.  So, to that end, we're back with another entry into the Aces Casino Blog - This one appropriately entitled, "Stupid Criminals and Disturbing Photographs."  Hope you like it....

#1 -- "If you can't even come up with a good fake name, give up your dream of being a crook"

Circumstances: On June 10, 2010, a man named Frankie Portee was riding in the back of a car when it was pulled over by the police. Portee had multiple outstanding probation warrants, and was understandably concerned that the cops would find out about them. So he cleverly decided to identify himself with a fake name.  I’ll let Associate Justice Mark V. Green, who wrote the recent Massachusetts Appeals Court opinion affirming Portee’s conviction, take it from here:
Trooper Alan Driscoll noticed that the defendant was not wearing a seat belt and asked the defendant his name and date of birth in order to cite him for a seat belt violation. The defendant gave the false name of “Daniel Atkins” and a birth date of January 28, 1983.
Trooper Driscoll ran the name “Daniel Atkins” though the computer in his cruiser, and learned that there was an active arrest warrant for a Daniel Atkins, who had a birth date indicating an age in approximately the same range as the date provided by the defendant. Atkins's physical description appeared to match the defendant.
Whoops. Driscoll returned to the car and started to question the increasingly confused and nervous Portee, who apparently had no idea that he’d given the name of a wanted man. He responded with what, at the time, must have seemed like the only reasonable option: pushing Driscoll to the ground and trying to run away. This scheme, too, went awry; Portee was subdued, arrested, and sentenced to four years in state prison. The real Daniel Atkins may still be at large.


How he could’ve been a lot smarter: Portee could’ve worn his seat belt. Better yet, he could’ve just dispensed with the car entirely and decided to ride a bicycle.
How he could’ve been a little smarter: Been ready with a better pseudonym. Something trustworthy, like “Joe Innocent.”
How he could’ve been a little dumber: “Hello, my name is Trooper Driscoll. No, wait, that’s your name. Ahh, I’m so drunk right now.”
How he could’ve been a lot dumber: “The name’s, uh, Ayman. That’s right. Ayman al-Zawahiri.” [brushes hands together in gesture of extreme confidence]
Ultimate Dumbness Ranking (UDR): I feel for Portee. This is more a case of bad luck than stupidity. But, as they say, luck is the residue of design. If you know you might be in a situation where you’ll have to give the police a fake name, you ought to be prepared with a pseudonym that you’re absolutely sure is clean. Scour the Internet for lists of centenarians or National Merit Scholars. Take control of your fake identity. 3 out of 10 for Portee.

#2 -- "Worst Sports Sign Of The Week"

Wow.  Just.  WOW.  Not "Photoshopped."  Wow.

#3 -- "You Put An Airbag WHERE?"

Spoiler Alert:  The bride is about to blast off...

The motto of the day?... "Always end your blog with a YouTube video, you'll never go wrong."  That's all for the ol' A.C. Blog for Thursday.... We promise to do better next time when the top Orange County casino party company on the west coast returns on Monday with back-to-back articles about some brand new casino games coming soon (or already here) to a casino near you.  (Is Thackerville close to you?  Just askin'.)  "You know you love it."  Have a good weekend, and keep those cards and dice in the air!

Monday, April 15, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: The "Top 3 YouTube Videos Of The Week" For April (Yes, We're Sensing a Theme Here)


Here at Aces Casino, the crew known for being the top Orange County casino party company on the west coast, we strive for excellence in many fields, the most important one being our commitment to excellence in the field of Las Vegas night casino parties.  But, right behind THAT commitment lies our secondary reason for living -- The search for the wacky, weird, and goofy in any area of media.  It doesn't matter to us WHERE we fin d it, just that we DO discover these not-so-hidden gems of the internet, and turn them into, in this case, "viral videos."

Ahh, It's good to have a reason for living.

Hey - and what better place to search for these media marvels than the most popular video share-site in the internet world - YouTube?  And with that, It's time for the videos that our crazy crew here at Aces Casino deemed the "Top 3 YouTube Videos of the Week / Month."  (Ed. Note: Hope they're good / worth it, or all of you will need to find a new job / paycheck.  Now get off YouTube, and file our tax forms!  It's April 15th!)  Take it away, YouTube.....

#1 -- Two Guys in their '90's Race in a 100-Meter Dash 


We love ANYTHING we can gamble on.  Place your bets...

#2 -- Sergio Garcia's One- Handed Shot in a Tree (?)

OK, give the guy that FOUND this ball a prize.

#3 -- "Unbelievable Deal Or No Deal Finale"

I've said it a million times..."You should always listen to Grandma."

#4 -- Bonus Video!  For those who have seen it all at the track, this one's for you....

OK, fess up - Have you EVER seen THIS happen at the track?

Yes, by now, I'm sure you caught our "theme" for the week....Gambling.  All three of our vids had that "will they do it, who will win, who do I bet on" theme.  We'll bring this edition back to our Aces Casino Blog with a monthly feature, I'm sure.  (Ed. Note: I still can't believe that 'Deal Or No Deal' Guy.)  That's all for now from the top orange county casino night party company in the biz...We'll be back next week with some more irreverence in our weekly Blog... We'll see you then, have a great weekend!!

Thursday, April 11, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: Part Three of our 3-Part Series On The Infamous "Black Book" of Las Vegas Casinos


It's time for the top Orange County casino party company, A.K.A. Aces Casino Entertainment, to wrap up this interesting look into the official Las Vegas Casino's "Black Book,"  one of the most discussed, but rarely delved into book of it's kind anywhere.  Part Three of the series simply deals with the answer to the question, "hey, just who IS in this infamous Black Book of Las Vegas?"  Ask and you shall receive, my friends, courtesy of the top Orange County casino night party company in SoCal - Aces Casino

There have been 50 individuals entered on the List of Excluded Persons, otherwise known as Nevada's Black Book. The following is the year they were listed, their current age, and last known city of residence along with the reason they were listed:

* 1960 -- Marshall Caifano, 101, Chicago: A high-ranking Chicago mobster suspected of committing numerous killings who became the mob's Las Vegas enforcer.
* 1960 -- Louis Tom Dragna, 92, Covina, Calif.: One-time acting boss of the Los Angeles mob who unsuccessfully challenged the legality of the Black Book.
* 1960 -- Carl James Civella, deceased: Mob boss in Kansas City, Mo., who was convicted of skimming and maintaining hidden interests in the Tropicana.
* 1960 -- Nicholas Civella, deceased: Brother of Carl; another Kansas City mob boss convicted in the Tropicana case.
* 1960 -- Sam Giancana, deceased: Chicago mob boss, murdered gangland style, who was linked to the 1960 presidential election of John F. Kennedy and to a 1963 CIA plot to assassinate Cuban dictator Fidel Castro.
* 1960 -- Murray Llewellyn Humphreys, deceased: An alleged lieutenant of Chicago mobster Al Capone.Humphreys worked for Giancana.
* 1960 -- Joseph Sica, deceased: Los Angeles mobster involved in bookmaking, narcotics.
* 1960 -- Michael Coppola -- A New York City mob enforcer who was involved in drug trafficking and later moved to Miami, Fla.
* 1960 -- John Louis Battaglia, deceased: A Los Angeles mob associate who was arrested with Dragna on a vagrancy charge at the Desert Inn hotel-casino.
* 1960 -- Robert L. Garcia, deceased: A mob associate who lived in Southern California.
* 1960 -- Motel Grzebienacy, deceased: A mob associate who resided in Kansas City, Mo.
* 1965 -- Ruby Kolod, deceased: A Desert Inn hotel-casino executive who was alleged to have stolen money from the resort to finance an oil deal. He was removed from the Black Book later that year.
* 1965 -- Felix Alderisio, whereabouts unknown: A reputed Giancana lieutenant tied to Kolod's oil deal. He was removed from the book later that year and eventually became a Chicago mob boss.
* 1965 -- William Alderman, deceased: A one-time stockholder in the El Cortez, Flamingo and Riviera hotel-casinos who was also tied to Kolod's oil deal. He, too, was removed from the book.
* 1975 -- Wilford Kalaauala Pulawa, 77, Kauai, Hawaii: Alleged head of organized crime in Hawaii at a time when gaming regulators were concerned about junket representatives associated with him.
* 1975 -- Alvin George Kaohu, 75, Honolulu, Hawaii: Pulawa's right-hand man.
* 1978 -- Anthony Joseph Spilotro, deceased: The Chicago mob's enforcer in Las Vegas whose badly beaten body was found in an Indiana cornfield in 1986.
* 1986 -- John Joseph Vaccaro Jr., 73, Las Vegas: Convicted ringleader of a slot cheating operation who has also been convicted of illegal bookmaking.
* 1986 -- Sandra Kay Vaccaro, 73, Las Vegas: Vaccaro's wife and the only woman in the Black Book, she participated in her husband's slot cheating ring.
* 1986 -- Carl Wesley Thomas, deceased: One-time owner of Bingo Palace and Slots-A-Fun and executive at the Riviera, Stardust and Tropicana resorts who was convicted of skimming and holding a hidden interest in the Tropicana.
* 1987 -- Chris George Petti, 86, San Diego: A top organized crime figure in San Diego who was convicted of illegal bookmaking.
* 1988 -- Michael Anthony Rizzitello, 86, Reseda, Calif.: A reputed California mob associate convicted of attempting to extort casino leaders Benny Binion and Moe Dalitz.
* 1988 -- William Gene Land, 77, Las Vegas: Convicted of marking cards for a blackjack game.
* 1988 -- James Tamer, 101, Mt. Clemens, Mich.: A one-time Aladdin hotel-casino executive who was convicted of hiding his ownership interest in the resort after having been denied a gaming license.
* 1988 -- Frank Joseph Masterana, 84, Las Vegas: The bookmaker has a history of gambling-related convictions and allegedly was associated with mob figures.
* 1988 -- Frank Larry Rosenthal, 84, Boca Raton, Fla.: One-time entertainment director of the Stardust and Argent Corp. executive who was allegedly associated with mob figures and pleaded no contest to a charge of conspiracy to bribe a college basketball player.
* 1988 -- Gaspare Anedetto Speciale, deceased: A bookmaker convicted of interstate transmission of sports bets, loan-sharking, racketeering.
* 1989 -- Harold Travis Lyons, 77, Las Vegas: A convicted slot cheat whose rap sheet also includes convictions for burglary, grand theft and drug-related crimes.
* 1990 -- Joseph Vincent Cusumano, 77, Las Vegas: An alleged loan shark and Chicago mob associate who was convicted of helping to skim money from a Culinary Union life insurance plan.
* 1990 -- Douglas Joseph Barr, 54, Sparks: The youngest person listed in the Black Book is a convicted slot cheat who was imprisoned for making a cheating device causing electronic machines to pay out.
* 1991 -- Timothy John Childs, 65, Reno: A convicted slot cheat who made mechanical machines pay out by pulling the handle down part way and then jerking it.
* 1991 -- Francis Citro, 67, Las Vegas: Alleged to have ties to the Los Angeles mob, the former card dealer was convicted for extortion and racketeering and for using counterfeit credit cards.
* 1992 -- Richard Mark Perry, 69, Las Vegas: Convicted of fixing horse races and basketball games, he allegedly served as a bookmaker for the New York mob and was linked with the UNLV Rebels basketball team when he was photographed in a hot tub with three players.
* 1993 -- Anthony Michael St. Laurent, 72, Johnston, Rhode Island: An alleged "made member" of the New England mob convicted of running an illegal gaming operation, racketeering and cocaine possession.
* 1993 -- Albert Anthony Corbo, deceased: Owner of a Las Vegas sports information service who was convicted of bookmaking and conducting illegal gambling businesses in Atlantic City, N.J., Philadelphia and Miami Beach, Fla.
* 1993 -- Edward Lawrence DeLeo, deceased: A Boston mob associate with a bookmaking conviction who was also tied to Spilotro.
* 1994 -- Dominic Anthony Spinale, 77, Las Vegas: Another reputed New England mob associate and bookmaker, convicted with DeLeo of relaying betting information from Las Vegas to Boston.
* 1994 -- Brent Eli Morris, 56, Bridgeton, N.J.: He has multiple convictions for making bets after dice were thrown in craps and cards were dealt in baccarat.
* 1994 -- Douglas William Barr Sr., 77, Las Vegas: Father of Douglas Joseph Barr, he also is a convicted gambling cheat who used coins with strings attached to fool machines.
* 1997 -- William Dominick Cammisano Jr., 64, Harrisonville, Mo.: A reputed Kansas City mob underboss who was convicted of witness tampering during a grand jury investigation of a gangland-style killing.
* 1997 -- Ronald Dale Harris, 57, Las Vegas: A former state Gaming Control Board agent who was convicted of rigging slot machines in Washoe County so that jackpots were paid out if coins were bet in a specific sequence.
* 1997 -- Jerry Dale Criner, 64, Claremore, Okla.: A convicted slot cheat whose rap sheet also includes convictions for burglary, racketeering, theft and currency violations.
* 1997 -- Anthony Thomas Civella, 83, Kansas City, Mo.: The son of Carl Civella and nephew of Nicholas Civella is an alleged Kansas City mobster who was convicted separately of illegal bookmaking and of holding hidden interests and skimming from the Tropicana.
* 1997 -- Louis John Olejack, 62, Las Vegas: A card cheat who was convicted of bending blackjack cards at Harrah's Las Vegas.
* 1997 -- Stephen Anthony Cino, 76, Henderson: A reputed "made member" of the Los Angeles mob who was convicted in an extortion scheme to take over loan-sharking and insurance fraud operations run locally by the late Herbie Blitzstein.
* 1997 -- John Joseph Conti, 78, Las Vegas: He was convicted of attempting to file false credit applications at the Maxim hotel-casino.
* 1997 -- Charles Joseph Panarella, 88, Las Vegas: Convicted of attempted money laundering through the Maxim hotel-casino and a reputed member of the New York mob.
* 1998 -- Michael DiBari, 79, Las Vegas: A former Continental hotel-casino supervisor who was convicted of money laundering from the hotel and who was reputedly tied to imprisoned New York mobster John Gotti.
* 1999 -- Peter Joseph Ribaste, 58, Kansas City, Mo.: An alleged Kansas City mobster, he ran an illegal gambling operation there and later was convicted of mail fraud, wire fraud and failure to disclose Las Vegas gambling debts on loan applications in an attempt to buy a Kansas City car dealership.
* 2008 -- William Cushing, 60, Whereabouts Unknown:  Slot cheat extraordinaire.

Sources:  State Gaming Control Board, Nevada Gaming Commission and "The Black Book and the Mob" by Ronald A. Farrell and Carole Case

That's all for now, my Aces "Blogaholics."  The Black Book is officially in the rear-view mirror.....We'll see you next Monday with a brand new entry into the Aces Blog.... Next up - Our Aces Casino crew's favorite YouTube vids for the month of March, courtesy of the top orange county casino party company in SoCal.  See you then!


Monday, April 8, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: Part Two - The Vegas Casino's "Black Book," And One Man's Attempt to Rub It Out


Welcome back to the infamous Aces Casino Blog and Part Two of our series on the history of one of the most infamous and rarely-discussed books in the world - The Las Vegas Casino's "Black Book," also known by It's official title, "The Excluded Persons List."  Our sincere thanks to the Los Angeles Times, Times scribe John Glionna, and the Las Vegas Sun for bringing us the story of Frankie Citro, Jr., one man that is ready to have his day in front of the Las Vegas Gaming Control Board in an attempt to do something that no person before him has done - To have his name removed from the Vegas casino's "Black Book, while still alive and well.  Enjoy the ride, courtesy of the top Orange County casino party company on the West Coast - Aces Casino Entertainment...

Frankie is holding court at his regular table at a dingy roadhouse, about as far from the glamour of the Strip as you can get.  Men in suits stop to pay their respects, some kissing his cologne-splashed cheek. It’s a gesture of affection, like those of his neighborhood cronies in Jersey City, back in the old days.  These are the new days, though, and they haven’t been so kind to Frankie. He loves this live-music joint, don’t get him wrong. But when you’re Frank Citro Jr., there are only so many nightspots in this town where you’re still welcome.

For 23 years, he has been a regular addition to Nevada’s Black Book, officially known as the "Excluded Person List," an index of desert undesirables blackballed by the state’s casino regulators. Since its inception in 1960, the book has included such mobsters as William “Icepick Willie” Alderman, Murray “the Camel” Humphries and Chicago crime boss Sam “the Cigar” Giancana.  Black Book inclusion means you can’t own, manage or even enter a casino. The only way off the list is to die, and even then state regulators require a death certificate as proof that you are, indeed, truly departed.  (Tough Room.)

Now the 68-year-old Citro is attempting something never tried in the book’s history: He wants off the list while he’s still alive.  “I don’t belong in this book,” he said in his thick Jersey accent, an unlit Camel dangling from his lips. “I never cheated a casino, never had a fight there. I’m just supposedly a notorious felon. There are lots of felons in this town. Why me?”

Frankie Citro, Jr.

Rumors of the move have caught the Las Vegas Gaming Control Board by surprise, and officials had to consult their rules to determine that the challenge is indeed allowable. Now Citro is collecting documents and contacting character witnesses before his attorney requests a hearing with the board.  “For someone to come forward after so many years on the book, that’s something that’s never been tried before,” said James Taylor, deputy chief of the Gaming Control Board enforcement division.

In 1985, Citro and six others were convicted of bookmaking and loan-sharking operations in Southern California and Las Vegas that prosecutors said charged clients as much as 1,000 percent interest. He spent two years in prison.  To gaming officials, the verdict — not to mention the fact he had consorted with known mobsters — made him the kind of notorious character they didn’t want in Nevada’s casinos. So they put him in the Black Book, a distinction that dims even the brightest lights of Sin City. Being inside a casino, he knows, can mean arrest and even jail time.

Citro said the book discriminates against Italian Americans — half the list’s 33 current members have Italian surnames — and promotes Mafia stereotypes. This in a city that has embraced its organized crime roots with not one but two mob museums.  Citro is stubborn. Since being placed in the book in 1990, he has refused to leave Las Vegas to avoid the slightest hint of surrender. He continues to embrace a streetwise image, making wisecracks, gesturing with his hands and shoulders, ending sentences in “boom, boom, boom.” He likes to say he knows only two real tough guys, and the other one sends him a Christmas card every year.

Citro grew up the youngest of three sons in an Italian neighborhood in northern New Jersey. He showed an entrepreneur’s eye early on, shining shoes for neighborhood thugs. At age 13, he chased two guys into an alley. One put a gun to his head. He flinched and he hated himself for it. That’s when he vowed to never fear another man.

Frankie Citro has lived in Las Vegas since the late 1960s and is one of a few dozen people on the Nevada Gaming Commission's "Black Book." He is prohibited from stepping into a casino anywhere in the world. Citro tries to avoid the famous Las Vegas Strip because it is lined with the casinos that he used to frequent years ago.  Soon he was running numbers, fencing stolen goods. He became a bouncer. He worked collections. He bare-knuckle boxed for years, breaking people’s bones in and out of the ring.
He was a tough guy, he said, but not a made guy. Citro said he was never a member of organized crime.
“I never wanted those guys telling me what I had to do,” he said. “Only my mother had that power.”

While starting his federal sentence, Citro realized he was going to miss a crucial time in the life of his 1-year-old son, Francesco. That’s when he swore he’d never go back to prison, even if it meant cleaning toilets. One of the first jobs he got on the outside was running his own janitorial company.
“How many people promise to never return to jail again?” said his 20-year-old daughter, Bettina. “My dad actually kept his word.”  For a quarter-century, Citro has avoided jail and is off probation. He donates time for charity — rounding up bands and singing his beloved doo-wop music at fundraisers.

Citro showed up for his Gaming Control Board hearing in 1990 dressed in a tuxedo. It was a minor gesture of mock respect: Just out of prison, he figured he had paid his dues. The federal government had confiscated his Las Vegas luxury home. Now Nevada wanted to banish him from its casinos?  State prosecutors challenged his character, waving headlines of his racketeering trial that screamed phrases like “brass-knuckle therapy.” Citro found that particularly insulting: He’d never hit a man with anything but his own fists.
Officials decided he was “notorious and unsavory,” a guy with mobster cronies.

“They just buried me,” he said later. “They buried a man who’s still alive.”  Critics call the book an outdated relic of an era when wiseguys called the shots. Card cheats and slot crooks now pose a bigger threat to the industry, and some appear on the list. The last entry, Philadelphia mobster Frank Bulgarino, was added in 2004.

“I represented a lot of people in that book,” said Oscar Goodman, a former mob lawyer who later became Las Vegas mayor. “Many haven’t even been convicted of a crime. They just supposedly brought ignominy, scorn or derision to this great state of Nevada. It’s draconian and it’s silly.”  (Ed. Note: Two words that are normally mentioned when our orange county casino night party company holds their annual Christmas Party.  In March.  'Draconian' might be a little too strong....)

Nevada’s Excluded Person List was launched with the names of 11 reputed gangland figures. The book was later imitated by gaming states such as New Jersey, Michigan and Mississippi.  The Black Book really isn’t a book and it’s not even black. Originally bound by a black leather cover, it’s now a shiny gray binder. It still strikes fear in nominees.  When alleged mobster Stephen “the Whale” Cino learned of his hearing in 1997, the 325-pound felon told state investigators, “You just ruined my lunch.” At his hearing in 1987, gangster Frank “Lefty” Rosenthal screamed that he had dined with many board members, only to be stabbed in the back.  (You may remember that scene in the movie, "Casino," Starring Robert DeNiro as the character modeled as Mr. Rosenthal.)

Some friends have turned their backs on Citro, but he has new believers in his camp.  Like the North Las Vegas police officer he helped raise money for children with cancer.  “I’m a cop. I deal with lots of people who did things 40 years ago, now trying to eke out a living,” Steve Noahr said. “You pay your debt to society, why be persecuted for life?”  Former Lt. Gov. Lonnie Hammargren said that “if anyone gets off that list, it should be Frankie.”  He added: “It’s not just his past that put him in that book; it’s where he came from, his speech, his accent. At this stage, he’s probably cleaner than 90 percent of corporate Las Vegas making deals behind closed doors today.”  Taylor disagreed: “Even today, I don’t know if we’d still want Frank Citro frequenting our casinos.”

For now, Citro makes do. He’s had a succession of business ventures with only fleeting success — including a bar and strip club manager, plumber and carpenter. Job interviews go well, until bosses learn about the Black Book. He isn’t obligated to tell them, but the list pops up in a quick Internet search, and some in this town see it as a bigger black mark than the racketeering conviction.

Before the Black Book, he owned a nice house. Now he frets about paying rent for the space where he parks his double-wide trailer. The frustration has taken a toll on his health. A doctor has warned him of a possible blocked artery. But Citro said he’s not having any heart attack: That would ensure defeat.
With sadness in his voice, he mentions the 1994 film “The Shawshank Redemption,” in which a convict played by Morgan Freeman says he wants to talk to the young man he once was, just to tell him how stupid he is.  Now Citro awaits his new day in casino court, seeking redemption in a realm where there have been no second chances. This time, he thinks he’ll skip the tux.

That's all for Part Two of our Aces Casino look at the infamous "black book" of Las Vegas Casinos.   On Thursday, our famous orange county casino party company finishes up our "look at the book" series with a peek at who's IN the black book, and what got them there.  The Vegas "Rogue's Gallery," right here in 3 days.  We'll see you then!

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Thursday, April 4, 2013

Aces Casino Blog: Part One of our 3-Part Series On The Infamous "Black Book" Of Las Vegas Casinos


It happened during a discussion between three of our top game dealers here at Aces Casino Entertainment  (Ed. Note: Doesn't this blog ALWAYS get it's best ideas this way?), when the gab-fest turned to the subject of cheating at the Las Vegas casinos.  "We're well-known for our uncanny ability to cheat FOR the players here," said top Aces Casino Roulette dealer Scott Percifield.  "What happens to the people that try to cheat us?"  To which Craps specialist John Lopp, he of the 'Yosemite Sam look-alike contest,' replied quickly, "No problem - We put 'em in our Black Book."  (Ed. Note: Guffaws all around, these two guys are always a crack-up at our events.)

Now, let it be known right away that, when you play games with fake chips like Aces Casino (the top Orange County casino party company on the West Coast) does, you're really not in need of an official "Black Book."  Hey, here at Aces, the best reason to have valueless chips in the first place is that we regularly cheat FOR the players.  They don't need to cheat US.  We're ALREADY cheating us FOR them, It's inherently built into our DNA.  Needless to say, no one runs out of chips at an Aces Casino Entertainment event. 

Unless you're bringing us to your big yearly fundraiser.

That's when our kind-hearted, sweet-as-sugar casino game dealers turn on the players, and play the games by the rules, for keeps, so the charitable organization we work for can earn some much-needed funds for their next pet project.  It's really a sight to see; they go from laying down and playing dead to Schwarzenegger "Terminator" clones.  In our industry, it goes without saying - THIS orange county casino night party crew is the BEST in the biz at our craft.  (Ed, Note: Then why did you say it?  Get back to the blog-topic!)

But... It got us to thinking.... One thing we hadn't researched for any measurable amount of time here at Aces Casino WAS that infamous "Black Book" of Las Vegas, what it does, does it even exist, who's on it, stuff like that.  It sounded like the perfect tool for the parakeet paper known as the Aces Casino Blog.

So, without further fanfare, let's begin our trek with Part One of the Aces Blog's report on "The Infamous Black Book of the Las Vegas Casinos" -- Who's in this book, and why.

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The names IN the Black Book are Scorsese flick-worthy: Francis “Lefty” Rosenthal (an old acquaintance of ours back in the day); Dominic Anthony Spinale; Joseph Vincent Cusumano. Their crimes, the stuff of wise-guy legend: Louis Tom Dragna led organized crime in Southern California; Buffalo mobster Stephen Anthony Cino racked up a laundry list of charges from robbery to extortion. Their bravado, incomparable: Fred Anthony Pascente was a Chicago detective busted for mail fraud and linked to the Chicago mob; Timothy John Childs once listed “slot cheat” as his occupation on a loan application (Ed. Note: I love that one); repeat felon Frank Citro (racketeering, loan-sharking, illegal bookmaking) showed up at his Nevada Black Book hearing in a tuxedo and told commissioners, “I’ve never been invited to join anything in my life; I just wanted to show the proper respect.”

 Frank Rosenthal, "The Man That Ran The Stardust."

Back in April of 2008, the state Gaming Control Board nominated slot cheat William Cushing for inclusion in Nevada’s Black Book—also known as the more officious-sounding List of Excluded Persons. If inducted, he’ll be the 36th person banned from state casinos—the first since 2004. Created in 1967, the Black Book, according to UNLV gaming researcher David Schwartz, played a role in pushing the mafia out and corporations in.

Getting into the Black Book is rather easy. All you need is a prior felony, a conviction for violating gaming and tax laws, hidden interest (but no license) in a gaming establishment or a rep so notorious or unsavory that it erodes public confidence in the gaming industry. Good luck getting out, though. “About the only way is a judicial review, and that’s never been successful,” says Jerry Markling, chief of enforcement for the Gaming Control Board.

But casino banishment doesn’t mean a lifetime of playing Tonk. You can still drop a quarter in a slot machine. “They can go in restricted locations, places with 16 or fewer slots,” Markling says. “If there are more than 16 slots, it must be a slots-only facility.”

Or you could be Douglas William Barr bold: Three of his 150-plus arrests (mostly for gambling crimes) came after his Black Book inclusion. His son, also Douglas (they’re the only father-son tandem - gee, Dad, thanks for the same name at birth), has been arrested more than 30 times on gambling charges. The lone woman on the list, Sandra Vaccaro, organized a slot-cheating operation, along with husband John Vaccaro, that stole millions from Nevada casinos. Scofflaws can get a return trip to the clink. Says Markling: “It’s a gross misdemeanor if they violate the order; that can mean up to a year in jail.”

There is a list longer and maybe more onerous than the Black Book. From 1980 to March of this year, 112 individuals have been found unsuitable for a gaming license or have had licenses denied or revoked. “It’s very intense, probably one of the most intrusive processes ever,” Schwartz says. “You’re asked questions like what car do you drive. Most honest people would have trouble getting a gaming license in Nevada.”
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That's it for this edition of the Aces Casino Blog for Thursday.  We hope all of you enjoyed Part One of our look into the "Black Book" of Las Vegas.  (Damn, It's not even BLACK.)  On Monday, the top Orange County casino party company in SoCal brings you Part Two of our series on the Black Book of Vegas - An In-depth Look at one man that's taking a shot at the impossible task of getting his name OUT of the book.  (Hint: you normally have to die first.  Boy, you talk about a tough club to get out of.)   We'll see you then, keep those very cool comments comin', we LOVE to hear from our fans!

Monday, April 1, 2013

Aces Blog "Greatest Hits:" When a Trip to Las Vegas Turned Into a Game Show Called "The $389 Question"


(Ed. Note: Since the Aces team is out of town today for an event, we thought to ourselves, "what better way to celebrate April Fool's day is there than recounting the time where the "Blogmeister" took the pipe while traveling to visit Las Vegas on 'business?'"  Sounds good to us... So, by popular demand, let's dig into the Aces Casino Blog "Greatest Hits" archive for this lil' ditty.  The team will be back on Thursday, unless they 'run afoul of the law...')

One of the many perks of working for a company like Aces Casino is the opportunity to be with your friends and family on most holidays, since the Orange County casino party leader traditionally doesn't have events on big holidays (except New Years' Eve).  This CAN be a blessing, but as some of the Aces Casino staff discovered, it can also be a "curse."

It's Labor Day weekend, 2010, a weekend that most sports fans just LOVE; The NFL and college football are starting their seasons, and Major League Baseball is heading into their stretch run.   It's a great time to be a fan, and an even GREATER time to be a sports bettor.  So many games on the big board, and so little time to place those wagers on our favorite selections.

That's the main reason that three staff members (myself included) decided to make that short run to "Sin City" late one Friday night, once another one of the Aces Casino star-studded Orange County casino night parties came to a close.  Normally, traffic to Vegas can be a pain, but we weren't leaving until Midnight, so we assumed that this would be a quick trip to Vegas, a trip made even quicker by, shall we say, "exceeding the speed limit."

THAT was "Bad Decision Number One."

Not long into the trip, a California Highway Patrol cruiser spotted us doing about 85 on I-15, somewhere around Riverside county.  THAT was "Bad Decision Number Two."  Soon, it was lights and siren, we pulled over, and a very hospitable officer wrote this reporter a ticket for the speeding, warned us to be a little more careful, and sent us on our way.

The stoppage really didn't hit us too hard as far as our schedule goes, so we were able to get back on the road, watch our speed, and make it to Vegas in time to get a room, grab 40 winks, get up the next morning, and spend three full days and nights betting games like crazy.  Did pretty good, too; hit three different parlays, cracked a few horse races, and hit the college and NFL games to the tune of a nine-win, two-loss result.  77% will always get it done.

Translation: We had a GREAT time..

We came home late that next Monday evening totally refreshed, and parted ways late that night boasting overall profits of about $600 each.  Then, when I returned home, I was reminded of the only glitch in our fun-filled weekend -- That speeding ticket that yours truly received during the trip to Las Vegas.

 It all seemed so "trivial" at the time...

Agh.....OK, Gotta do this...I looked for and found the ticket, and since it was issued in Riverside County, California, that's the court that I'll have to attend.  So, I looked it up, found it and found out where it was, and three weeks later, on a Friday, I officially visited the Riverside County Courthouse to deal with my ticket.  The person I talked to on the phone to verify the court's locatiuon warned me to be on time...

At 7 AM.

THAT'S Bad Decision Number 3.

Now, because of my employment at Aces Casino, the Orange County casino party kingpin, I tend to keep, shall we say, "late hours."  The events don't normally start until 7 or 8 O'Clock, aren't completed until past Midnight, and it takes a little time to properly dismantle the casino once the event is over.  Because of those loose facts, me being ANYWHERE by 7am, let alone Riverside, is a tough nut to crack.  But, I did the crime, gotta do the time.  Got up, and dragged myself out there, and brought a book with me (a trivia book), just in case there was some time to pass.

I get to the court, find the courtroom handling my speed-demonship, and when the doors open (at 7:20), I file in.

Me, and what seems like a hundred other people.  Oh, that's just GREAT.... Hope I'm in the first 10 or so, I have a lot of things to do back at Aces Casino that day.....

Anyway, we all sit down, and the bailiff comes out to talk to us.  He shows us the ropes, tells us how everything is going to go, but after about 5 minutes or so, he asks the group, "How many of you in this courtroom will need an interpreter when taking their turn with the judge?"

I kid you not.  99.99% of the hands were raised.  Only me, and what looked like five or six other people, DIDN'T raise their hands.  (Hey, if they don't speak English, how's they know to raise their hands?  Sorry, I digress....)  Upon seeing this, the bailiff tells us that this information is important to the court, because they need to know how long to keep the court's bilingual interpreter.  He then looks over at this man sitting at a table, and nods to him.

Then, it dawns on me.  They're going to take all the hispanic English-Challenged citizens first......Oh, my gosh....I look at my watch, it's now about 7:50AM, and the bailiff tells us, "OK, court will be in session in about 30 minutes."  Why?  He needs to process all these people first, I'm told.

GREEEEEAT.  This won't even START until around 8:30am, and I'm instantly looking like I'm at the back of the line, because I'm NOT in need of an interpreter.  I immediately jump up out of my seat, go out to my car, and grab my trivia book.  It's going to be a long, day, I can just feel it.

That's the only thing I got right all day.  At 8:30am, the judge shows up, and he has the Bailiff call the first name.  "Jose Garcia."  Yep, we have a winner.  He walks up, can't speak english, pleads his case, and gets some sort of fine.  I'd tell you what it was, but the damned courthouse proceedings are all in Spanish.  I'm looking for the "Subtitles" button on my invisible remote.  Nope, no dice.  I'm stuck.  The judge is speakin' english, but I can't tell you the answers that he's gettin'.


What transpires in the next four hours is one Spanish-speaking scofflaw after another, all needing the interpreter, all doing basically the same thing, and seemingly getting the same fine.  12:30 finally arrives.  LUNCH.  ANOTHER half-hour lost.  I'm not CLOSE to escaping this Night-Mare-O.  I don't know why they have a lunch break.  There's nowhere to eat, OR sit down.  They kick you out of the courtroom during lunch.

 Note to the Court - GET ONE OF THESE!

So, the doors open back up at 1:15pm.  Long lunch for his honor.  The remaining speeders and what-have-you people go back in, and I'm counting Hispanic heads.  16, 17, 18, OK, 19.  19 more, then the seven of us that are left.  Unfortunately for me, THESE 19 people seemingly have complicated cases.  They're ALL taking their time.  It's different Spanish (at least it SOUNDS like different Spanish words), and we now have an attorney or two, and HE'S speakin' Spanish.  The hands on the clock are spinning ....2:15 ....2:40 ......3pm...The Bailiff announces, "we'll try to get everyone in today."  You gotta be kidding me.....

I'm hot as a $2 pistol by now.  My entire day has been shot watching this Spanish "Soap Opera," and the last of the interpreter-clients doesn't step up until 3:35.  I'm frustrated, tired, and so hungry, I'm considering eating some of the trivia book by now.

Of the eight remaining people, I end up being NEXT TO LAST.  4:10pm.  I've been here NINE HOURS, and by now, I'm blaming everyone for this, including the three guys I went to Vegas with, the CHP, the Border Patrol, you name it.  I've read the book I brought TWICE by the time I finally get up in front of the judge.

He calls me by my last name, reads the citation as doing "90 in a 65 zone."  90?  Hell, my car can't even GO 90.  "I thought it was 85," I mention to the judge, and for the first time, this judge looks down at me, over his glasses.

I can tell he's not happy about my lil' outburst.  He starts going on this diatribe about speeders on California's freeway, and how much of a danger we are to the road, especially at night.  I'm looking at my watch as the diatribe goes on, and he tells me what this is going to cost me -- $175.00.  Now, I'm even MORE ticked at what's going on in the courtroom, and think back to that fateful night, when it looked to me like everyone ELSE on the I-15 that night was going about the same speed.....

It looks like he's finally done with me, after blaming me for everything from the uptick in traffic deaths in California to the Rams moving out of California...And that's when he asks me that fateful question.....

"Mr. Aces.....Do you have any questions before I rule?"

Boy, I wish he wouldn't have put it that way.  I'm so frustrated at this crazy day, that for some stupid reason, I thought of the book I brought with me.  "Yeah, I have a question," I responded to him.  "What major league baseball player hit a home run in his first major league at-bat, then never hit another in his long and storied baseball career, spanning over 20 years?"

I noticed the Bailiff and the court reporter WERE conversing with each other, but stopped talking when they heard what came out of my mouth.  They both looked at me, then looked at the judge, then looked at each other again, and it seemed like time had stopped on planet Earth.  Even the Spanish-speaking throng were quiet.  (I knew they could speak English.)  This hush over the courtroom lasted for quite awhile, until the judge spoke again......

"The answer to your question is Hoyt Wilhelm, Mister Aces, and, on top of your previous fine, that answer by this court will cost you a contempt-of-court citation.  Pay the bailiff on your way out."

Oh-my-GAWD.  Yep, that's the answer.  I can't believe I just did that.  The bailiff just starts laughing out loud, and the court reporter got a big kick out of it, too.  I shuffled over to the Bailiff's desk, where he asked me, "Is that the right answer?"

"Yes, it is," I responded.  "Damn, he IS good.  Son, you picked on the wrong judge.  He knows his baseball.....," as he let out this hillbilly laugh once again.  What's the damage, you ask?  $175 for the speeding, and $389 for the contempt charge.   My winnings in Las Vegas.

I guess it could have been worse.  It could have been Judge Judy.  From this day on, I've ALWAYS driven under 65 MPH when going thru Riverside, watch every reality-show small-claims court TV episode waiting for someone else to do something stupid.  (And they do...)  That always makes me feel better.

Every time I hear Wilhelm's name I twitch, and reach for my wallet.

THAT was Bad decision number FOUR.  Just goes to show you, I'm much better blogging about Aces Casino, and am so glad the base of operations of the company isn't in Riverside County.  Yep, we do our Orange County casino party stuff right here in Whittier and Buena Park, thank you very much.

So much for my getting a job as a game show host or a stand-up comedian.  I still can't believe I did that inside that courtroom, but with every tough lesson learned, there's always a moral to the story -- If the answer is Hoyt Wilhelm, do NOT ask the question.