Thursday, February 3, 2011

Aces Casino Monthly Top 10: From the Super Bowl to the Academy Awards. ($990 for WHAT?)

 No one asked us, but the orange county casino party leader has opinions, and tons of them.  Here are (in no particular order) the top 10 things on the minds of the team here at Aces Casino, also the los angeles casino night party champion....

1.  The Super Bowl might generate more wagering than any other annual event in the United States (Look It Up), but this Packers / Steelers game is one we'd suggest is best left alone.  The two teams both have an above-average passing attack, and somewhat "questionable" secondaries.  (Yeah, I know. Polamalu, Woodson, et cetera.  Great individual players with better defensive schemes.)  If you like both teams, take that as a hint.  You're more likely to suffer a bad beat on this one at the end of the game when some player on one team makes the play of the year, when you SHOULD have had your money on the respective NFC / AFC Championship Games, which were easier to handicap.

2.  The Green Bay Packers haven't been behind in a game by more than seven points ALL SEASON, and the Pittsburgh Steelers have some 38 Super-Bowl-tested players heading for Dallas.  That's why we refer to thing #1 above.  Don't bet the game.  Too much heartache.  Wait for the 2011 season (If we HAVE one).

3.  Word was that parking, I repeat, PARKING, at the Super Bowl was going for as high as (are you sitting down?) $990.00, and THAT parking lot is already SOLD OUT.  At $990 a POP.  I'm in the wrong business.  Wait, and there's a TAX on the parking space you're paying for?  Yeah, I'm DEFINITELY in the wrong business.  Hey, there's parking available at the Arlington Bank Of America for just $55, but it's more than a mile away.  Bring your sneakers.  Hey, if I'm sitting at the drive-thru ATM, do I get hit up for the $55?  Just wondering....

4.  Aces Casino is the best orange county casino party company in Southern California.  Yeah, we're biased, it's a shameless plug, but we're also right.  No one puts on better events than Aces Casino Entertainment.  Entertaining dealers, casino-quality equipment and professional event staff. are some pretty fine shows appearing on TV right now... Our faves?  We'll go with Pawn Stars (LOVE the Old Man), 48 Hours Mystery, Winter Wipeout (John, Jon and Jill are too funny), Damages (Damn, that Glenn Close is EVIL), and The First 48.  Hey, we may be the orange county casino party giant, but we don't have a TV Guide.  Look 'em up, you'll be glad you did.  Oh, plus, The Amazing Race returns on Feb. 20.  LOVE "The Amazing Race."  Wish I could be on that, but my wife'd kill me 20 minutes after the race started.  I'm a crappy designated navigator.

I bet THESE guys wouldn't pay $990 to park.

6.  This "Ted Williams" thing is not going to do anything but end badly.  It really pains me to see the gossip media outlets like TMZ and the Faux-Doctors like Phil McGraw build this poor guy up so far for their own ratings-driven selfishness, just to purposely tear him down later on.  They can't WAIT for this poor man to fail.... I hope Ted can tame all of those drug and alcohol-induced demons, but I'm afraid he won't be able to.  And then, the media vultures will eat him alive.  Good luck living with yourself when he falls, "Doc."  Tim Conway, Jr. knows the deal.  See you at the track, Tim.

7.  I hope Colin Firth has room on his mantle for that Academy Award that he'll be receiving at the end of this month.  He really deserves it, he's wonderful in "The King's Speech."  But with all the hardware he's already received, the mantle might already be crowded.  Just like our mantle at the orange county casino night leaders, what with all those trophies.  (Really.)

8.  On the Ladies' side of all things Oscar, you have to love Natalie Portman in "The Black Swan."  Wow.  After seeing her with 683 hairdos in "Star Wars Part-Whatever," I thought Lucas had ruined her career opportunities right along with that little kid he hired to play Anakin Skywalker, Jake-Something.  Ten years later, Portman will undoubtedly get her well-deserved trophy, and Jake-Something, A.K.A. "The Paperboy," will deliver her the newspaper that tells her about her win, the day after.  There IS justice.
Taken from a milk carton two years ago.  Have YOU seen this actor?

9.  Movies I can't wait to see in 2011:  "Super 8," and "The Green Lantern."  No, not that awful "Green Hornet" film.  The OTHER one.  The GOOD one.  My gosh, who WROTE that Green Hornet script, my son?  He writes like that when he eats too many cookies.  I'm guessing that Seth Rogen doesn't have that "out."  Holy MOLY, Seth!  WHAT was THAT?  The film editor for that pic deserves the Oscar just for assembling that mess.  Quick note: I had a buddy that was working on "Super 8" in a place called Weirton, WV, and he says it'll be one of the blockbusters of the 2011 movie season.  Kind of a "Cloverfield 2" type flick.  

10.  Bet those football-fans-turned-popsicles in Dallas that are freezing their rear-ends off in all that pre-Super Bowl splendor aren't interested in hearing theories about "Global Warming" any time soon.  Anyone that wonders where all the used-car salesmen went can look no further than the list of goofball scientists that think that what little we do to give out "carbon offsets" actually amounts to a hill of beans in this fantastic place we call Earth.  Get real, you quacks.  Earth's been around a lot longer than your cockamamie theories, and will live on when you're gone.  

Well, that's all from the orange county casino party leaders for this month.  Remember, if you're looking to put together an inexpensive casino party, call Aces Casino.  Our parties are less expensive than parking spots in Dallas.  It doesn't get any better than that, my friends.

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